读后续写之细节描写 学案-2025届高三英语上学期一轮复习专项

微技能 如何用细节描写塑造人物形象 某种意义上说，读后续写就是一篇微型的小说。小说有其基本的构成要素，在通常情况下，人们把最能显示小说独特性的人物、情节、环境称为“小说三要素”。读后续写中我们可以用描写的手段来塑造人物形象，描写不同于叙述，是通过细节的刻画来表现人物的思想性格，交代人物活动的环境和事情发生的背景，解析事件发展、演变的全过程。本节中，我们着重介绍塑造人物形象的细节描写：人物描写，场面描写和环境描写。 一、人物描写 人物是三要素中最核心的因素，作者编写的对话、设计的冲突和故事的结尾，都需要人物来完成。不同的人物身份有着不同的外貌特征、语言和动作。因此，在叙述故事的过程中，我们首先要根据人物身份、性格决定如何描写人物。人物描写包括正面描写和侧面描写。正面描写涉及人物的外貌、语言、动作、神态、心理描写；侧面描写(侧面烘托)指通过他人的言行来反映人物形象等。在此，我们侧重讲解如何通过人物身体部位的细节对人物的外貌、神态、动作和心理进行描写。 (一)通过身体部位对人物外貌的描写 外貌描写即从人物的体貌特征(包括人物的容貌、衣着、体型、神情、姿态等)进行描写，以揭示人物的思想性格，表达作者的爱憎，加深读者对人物的印象。我们将人物的身体部位分为全身(包括体形、穿着打扮)、脸部(包括眉毛、眼睛、鼻子、嘴巴和下巴)、皮肤和头发等。 1.对人物的全身进行描写 对人物全身的描写是指对人物的整体形象进行描写。我们可以从人物的年龄、身高、体重、相貌、穿着打扮等方面着手，根据不同人物的年龄和身份，选择相关的词汇进行细节描写。在此，我们将描写人物全身的词汇进行积累： 身材: thin, fat, heavy, light, slim, slender(苗条的), skinny, plump(丰满的), stout(强壮的), muscular(肌肉发达的), a good figure, height, of medium size/ height, straight, humpbacked(驼背的)等； 着装: well- dressed, uniform, blouse, suit, in rags, long- sleeve等; 年龄: elderly, young, old, middle- aged等。 【思考】除了以上词汇，你还知道哪些呢? 案例1 He was a sailor, evidently——a tall, stout, and muscular- looking person, with a certain dare- devil expression of countenance. 翻译：很显然，他是个水手——身材高大，体格健硕，一脸蛮勇的表情。 解析:本句出自《莫尔格街凶杀案》,句中通过使用 tall, stout, muscular- looking, a certain dare- devil 表现了人物的体格健壮、性格勇猛，符合水手形象。 案例2 A man with very short, white hair walked across the road. He was about sixty years old, and he was tall and thin. 翻译：一个白发苍苍的老人穿过马路。他大概有六十岁了，又高又瘦。 解析:本句出自《别了,好莱坞先生》,句中从体型 tall and thin,年龄 about sixty years old,发型 short，white hair描写了这位过马路的老人，给远观的读者一个整体的人物形象。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①挺拔的 ②穿着讲究的 ③中等身材的 ④中年妇女 ⑤衣衫褴褛的 ⑥又高又帅的 ⑦身材姣好 ⑧穿着制服的 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①Suddenly (一个高大的身影) dressed in a dark cloak appeared before him. ②Tom started going bald when he was (在他三十多岁时)。 ③我正在公园散步时，一个衣衫褴褛的胖男人朝我走来。 ④ (她身材修长而苗条); her beautiful golden hair lay back in curls from her small ears. ⑤站在那少女身后的是一位四十好几的女人，她不是一般的胖，粗笨的双腿移动时摇摇晃晃。 2.对人物的脸部进行描写 人物脸部的静态描写就如同一幅素描画，脸部的轮廓勾勒分明，读者能从画中看出人物的气质特征；也像在进行近景拍摄，读者随着镜头看到脸部的细节，可推测出人物的性格品质。在写作中，我们可以根据人物的身份，选择脸部最具特色的部位进行详细描述。在此，我们将描写人物脸部的词汇进行积累。 整体印象: pretty, ugly, attractive, charming, good- looking, ordinary/ plain- looking, handsome等； 面部特征: rosy, moustache, beard, whisker, scar, wrinkle, freckled(有雀斑的), pim-pled等; 脸型:a long face, thin/ round- faced, square等; 眼睛: wide- eyed, beady- eyed, round eyes等; 下巴:a double chin, sharp chin, pointed, stubbly chin 等; 眉毛: eyebrow, thick, shaggy, brow 等; 鼻子 &嘴唇: flat, hooked, big, high- bridged nose, thick lips等。 【思考】除了以上词汇，你还知道哪些呢? 案例1 Just then a tall man came up behind her. He had a large, square face, with strongly pro- nounced eyebrows and cheekbones. 翻译：就在这时，一个高大的男人从她身后走了过来，他有一张大而方的脸，有浓浓的眉毛和凸出的颧骨。 案例 2 One of them had a broad back and big muscles. The other one was taller with cold, staring eyes. 翻译：其中一人的背部很宽，肌肉也很发达。另一个长得更高，双目圆睁，眼神冰冷。 案例3 The boy had huge, dark eyes that seemed too big for his thin, pale face. 翻译：那个男孩有着大大的、深色的眼睛，就他瘦削、苍白的脸庞而言显得太大。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①圆脸的 ②睁大眼睛的 ③高鼻梁的 ④胡子拉碴的下巴 ⑤浓密的眉毛 ⑥面色红润 ⑦相貌平平的 ⑧布满皱纹的脸 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①Nicholas Skinner (有只大大的鹰钩鼻), more teeth than a bulldog and a temp er as hard as his voice. ②两道浓黑的眉毛使他的脸看起来异常凶狠。 ③他仪容整洁，穿戴漂亮，就是人长得不好看。 ④大夫挺直身子，转过身来：浓密的金发，宽阔的方脸，结实有力的下颌。 ⑤She looked very young with very creamy skin, ( 乌黑的大眼睛像珠子). 3.对人物的肤色及头发进行描写 头发和肤色在外貌描写中不是重要的部分，但在适当的时候对此进行描写，也能突出人物的身份及特征。很多时候，我们并不是单纯地描写身体某个部位的特征，对身体各部分进行交叠描写往往更常见。在描写肤色和头发时，只需要交代它们留给读者的大致印象。我们整理的这两部分的词汇有： 头发: curly(卷发的), straight, wavy(波浪状的), gray, blonde, red, black, thick, fine, hairstyle, haircut, short, long- haired, dark- haired, crew cut(平头), pony- tail(马尾辫), shoulder- length, glossy(光滑的)等; 皮肤: fair/ dark- skinned, smooth, rough, soft, tattoo, silky, complexion, freckled, wrinkled等。 【思考】除了以上词汇，你还知道哪些呢? 案例1 He had glorious rust- coloured hair and blue eyes, the colour of the sky. 翻译：他有着瑰丽的铁锈色的头发和蓝色的眼睛，天空的那种颜色。 案例2 He was tall, and brown from the sun. He wore a white shirt, white trousers, and white shoes. 翻译：他很高，被太阳晒得皮肤黝黑。他穿了一件白衬衫，白裤子，白鞋。 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①长发的 ②齐肩长的 ③皮肤黝黑的 ④卷曲的短发 ⑤有纹身的皮肤 ⑥有光泽的头发 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①那个女人留着齐肩长的微红色头发，皮肤苍白有雀斑。 ②他又矮又胖，留着一把沙子色的胡子，前额有些雀斑，头发稀少。 ③She was twenty- two now, (有一头直直的褐色长发), like her mother's, and the same full lips. ④ (他的波浪式头发太长了), and flopped just beneath his brow. ⑤她的波浪型的头发是天生的，美丽的浅棕色。 ⑥ (她的头发浓密亮泽), and in tip- top condition. (二)通过身体部位对人物神态的描写 对人物神情、姿态的描写主要集中在脸部表情，可以是嘴、眼睛、眉毛等，描写时要用表示表情、神态的词语，例如阴沉着脸、迷茫的神情等。在读后续写的过程中，我们可以根据需要，抓住人物特征，刻画人物性格，显示人物灵魂。要学会这部分描写技能，我们首先要掌握相关的词汇。这些词汇通常有： 各种笑: smile, laugh, giggle, titter(傻笑), snicker(窃笑), grin(露齿而笑), smirk(得意地笑), sneer(冷笑), beam, guffaw(哄笑), chuckle(轻声地笑), chortle(开怀大笑), simper(假笑), smile a smile, force a smile, one's smile broadens, wear a smile, laugh out loud, be all smiles, split into a smile等; 各种哭: sob, weep, wail(哀号), cry, burst into tears, cry one's eyes out, be close to tears, tears stream/ roll down one's cheeks, tears well up, tears blur one's vision, moisten(湿润), water, hold back one's tears, choke, tears roll in one's eyes, one's eyes are wet, be flooded with tears等; 各种表情及动作:a blank face, a poker face, serious, stern, glow, light up, flush(脸红), blush(羞愧), thunder, crimson(深红色的), raise one’s eyebrow, scowl(愁眉苦脸的), frown, dis- tant, vacant, thoughtful, gloomy, wooden, amazed, surprised, disappointed, frightened, shocked, angry, furious, satisfied, sympathetic 等。 【思考】除了以上词汇，你还知道哪些呢? 案例1 I did as he said, and my feet came to rest on a firm platform. I laughed with relief. 翻译：我照他说的做了，我的脚停在一个坚实的台子上。我宽慰地笑了笑。 案例2 Spanner ran up.“I'm dreaming!” he said, grinning from ear to ear. 翻译：斯潘纳跑起来。“我是在做梦吧！”他说道，满脸笑容。 案例3 Danny winced as the first goal rocketed into the Lowgate net. 翻译：在第一个得分球像火箭一样射进楼盖特队的球网时，Danny皱了皱眉。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①咧嘴笑 ②矫揉造作地笑 ③自鸣得意地笑 ④轻声地笑 ⑤嘲笑； 嗤笑 ⑥咯咯地笑 ⑦泪流满面 ⑧茫然的表情 ⑨心不在焉的表情 ⑩大哭起来 — (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①黛西女士面朝他，脸色阴沉。 ②他脸色阴沉，抬眼看了看我。 ③莫莉转过脸去瞪视天空，眼神似已飘到了远方。 ④当我回忆与奶奶在一起的幸福时刻时，不禁泪流满面。 ⑤ (然后，一种更加阴郁的表情在他脸上散布开来), as he dug into his pocket and pulled out two ten pound notes. ⑥派克先生脸色苍白。不知怎的，他挤出了一丝笑容。 ⑦突然，他们的眼里闪耀出一束如炬的光芒。 ⑧他们都惊得张大了嘴巴。 ⑨他咧嘴笑个不停。 ⑩多利站在那里，看上去很伤心，很震惊。 (三)通过身体部位对人物动作的描写 动作描写是刻画人物的重要方法之一。人物的每一行动都是受其思想、性格制约的。因此，具体细致地描写某一人物在某一情况下所做出的动作反应，就显示出了这一人物的内心活动、处世态度、思想品质。我们根据不同的身体部位，将常见的动作描写进行了细分。 1.脚部动作 脚部动作多指一个人的走路方式，要学会这部分描写技能，我们首先要掌握相关的词汇。这些词汇主要有: walk, run, crawl(爬行), creep(匍匐爬行), scramble(攀登), climb, march,stride, trek(长途跋涉), tread(踩,踏), tramp(步行), stagger(蹒跚), stumble, limp(跛行), pace, wander, tiptoe, leap, slip, skip, hop, dash, chase, race, rush, gallop(飞奔), trot(小跑), canter(慢跑), scamper(惊惶奔跑), on all fours, jump to one's feet, feel/ elbow/ fight/ force one's way 等。 案例1 Then she would run from one garden to the other, the wind in her face, her hair blowing everywhere. 翻译：然后，她从一个花园跑到另一个花园，风吹拂在脸上，头发随风飘扬。 案例2 Then Mrs. Medlock stormed in, the usual scowl nailed to her face. 翻译：接着，梅德洛克太太怒气冲冲地走了进来，像往常那样满脸怒容。 案例3 As she brushed past Mrs. Medlock, she shot her a meaningful look. 翻译：当她从梅德洛克太太身边擦肩而过时，她向她投去一个意味深长的目光。 案例4 A frightened ha re dashed past. The dogs chased her across the bank and stream, then they all thundered across our field. 翻译：一只受惊的野兔飞奔而过。狗追着它越过河岸和小溪，然后它们都轰隆隆地穿过我们的田地。 案例5 He handed me to someone else, then darted back into the stable. 翻译：他把我交给别人，然后冲回马厩。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①蹑手蹑脚地移动 ②(快速地)行走；行军 ③蹒跚； 摇摇晃晃地走 ④踮着脚走 ⑤冲; 猛冲; 冲向 ⑥蹦蹦跳跳地跑 ⑦徘徊； 闲逛； 漫步 ⑧一瘸一拐地走 ⑨(骑)马飞奔； 疾驰 ⑩轰隆隆地移动 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①I just had time to (跳起来) and draw my sword before (第一只老鼠就向我扑来). ② (我正打算要走过去), but one of the animals (跳下来，跳到我面前来). ③可怜的鲁本( Reuben)躺在马车里，冰冷得像石头一样，而我痛苦地在后面蹒跚而行。 ④我看见马克在医院里焦躁不安地踱来踱去。 ⑤她以最快的速度爬下树。 2.嘴部动作 嘴部动作多指“哭”“笑”和各种“说”等动作，关于“哭”和“笑”的嘴部动作，我们在前面的神态描写环节已有提及，这里主要关注“说”的各种表达。要学会这部分描写技能，我们首先要掌握相关的词汇。 主要有以下词汇: say, tell, shout, cry, yell, pant(喘气), gasp, bellow(咆哮), mock(嘲弄), sneer(讥笑), scoff(嘲弄), joke, scream, screech(尖叫), stammer(结巴地说), mumble(咕哝), mutter(轻声低语), murmur, whisper, repeat, reply, answer, explain, exclaim(呼喊), complain, groan(呻吟), moan, grumble(抱怨), rant(咆哮), admit, order, command, request, require, recommend, comment, criticize, declare, announce, yawn, bite, swallow, spit, whistle, chew, cough, break the ice/ silence, let out a cry等。 【思考】除了以上词汇，你还知道哪些呢? 案例1 “I'm going to chase that monster until this ship falls apart, ” he declared. 案例2 “ Put on all steam, ” Captain Farragut said grimly. (v.+ adv.) 翻译：“把所有的蒸汽都打开。”法拉古特船长冷冷地说。 案例3 “ Engineer, put on more steam, ” Captain Farragut ordered. 翻译：“工程师，再加点蒸汽。”法拉古特船长命令道。 案例4 “ Conseil, ”I spluttered. “ Did you fall overboard as well?” 翻译：“康西尔，你也从船上掉下来了吗?”我急促而慌乱地说。 案例5 “ The professor is giving up his freedom for a greater good of science, ” Conseil said, in my defence. 翻译：“教授为了更伟大的科学利益放弃了他的自由。”康西尔为我辩护说。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①结巴地说 ②低语； 喃喃自语 ③尖叫；尖声说 ④气喘吁吁地说 ⑤口齿不清地说 ⑥评论(说) ⑦批评(说) ⑧承认(说) ⑨抱怨(说) ⑩耳语； 低语 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①“I…I found the key. The robin showed me where it was, ” — (玛丽结结巴巴地说). ②“ Do you know who I am?” (科林厉声道), his face as furious as the gardener’s. ③“ This is not a game, Ned Land. (这是生死攸关的事),” ( Nemo没好气地说). ④“ Yes, I can see that they' re free and we' re not, ” ( Ned指着所有的鱼，酸酸地说). ⑤Omar moistened his lips. He (用嘶哑的声音喊道),“ Help! Help, I'm down here!” 3.眼部动作 眼部动作包括眼睛和眉毛的动作，在前面神态描写中我们已经提及各种描写“哭”及眉毛动作的词汇。要学会这部分描写技能，我们首先要掌握相关的词汇。这里，我们特地将“看”的各种动作进行归类,有 see, look at/ shoot sb. a look, watch, notice, observe, witness, glimpse(一瞥), glance, search, peer(凝视), gaze, stare, glare, at the sight of, catch/ lose sight of, peep(偷看), lay one's eyes on, set one's eyes on sth, catch one's eye, focus/ fix one's eyes on, have/ take a look at, gawp 等。 案例1 I was sitting in my box one day when there was a thumping on the wall and I saw two bright eyes peering in through the open window. 翻译：有一天，我坐在我的箱子里，突然箱子壁上有碰撞声，我看见两只明亮的眼睛透过天窗朝里窥视着。 案例2 She gazed at the empty branch for a second and that's when she knew, just knew, that the robin had sung to her from the locked secret garden. 翻译：她注视着光秃秃的树枝。也就在此时，她知道，她就是知道，那只知更鸟从锁着的秘密花园里给她鸣唱。 案例3 Sure enough she soon heard his cheery call and there he was, staring down at her with those black, beauty eyes. 翻译：果然，她很快就听到了它(知更鸟)那欢快的叫声，它就在那儿，用那双黑珠子般的眼睛俯视着她。 案例4 He gave his City team mates a nasty look as he jerked a thumb towards them. 翻译：他朝他城市队的队友不满地看了一眼，并用大拇指指了指他 案例5 As Del walked back to the middle, the eyes of all his mates arrowed into him. 翻译：当德尔走回球场中间时，所有队员的目光都像箭一样向他射来。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①一看见 ②怒视 ③看不见 ④直瞪瞪地注视 ⑤(目光)聚焦于 ⑥见证 ⑦(朝)偷看 ⑧(朝)看一眼 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①她高兴地唱着歌，用天真无邪的大眼睛凝视着周围的环境。 ②当他看完之后，他抬起眼睛，向窗外看去。 ③我使劲地吞咽着，盯着梅根的眼睛看了很长一段时间，想知道我怎么能应付得来。 ④我无助地看着这位女士，越来越沮丧和绝望。 ⑤她看见一个人在大厅里踱来踱去。 ⑥他把梯子靠在墙上，爬了上去，朝上看了看。 ⑦他们三个向她投去感激的目光，然后消失了。 4.手部动作 手部动作主要是指手臂和手指的动作，手部动作的描写在人物描写中也占有很大的比重。这些描写除了能向读者传递动作信息外，还能传达人物的心理与情绪。要学会这部分描写技能，我们首先要掌握与手部动作相关的词汇。这里，我们只是列出一些在故事类文本中常见的与手部动作相关的词汇: give, take, carry, fetch, reach out/ for/ into, fish out, fumble(摸), run, dance, grasp, seize, grip(抓牢), hold, hold on to, catch, hug, embrace, wave, point, dip, dig, drag, pull, push, fold, fix, fill, hit, gesture, knock, lift, press, scrape(擦),scratch（挠）， stroke, comb, groom, slap, tap, throw, touch, wipe, tear, shake, beat, drum等。 案例1 He began to shake his fist at her. Mary became quite scared. 翻译：他开始向她挥舞拳头。玛丽非常害怕。 案例2 He ran his fingers along the top of his back.“ So I’m just like everyone else?” 翻译：他的手指沿着背部的上面向下移动。“所以说，我跟其他人一样了?” 案例3 Colin flung himself over so his face was buried in the pillow. He continued to wail and began banging his stick- like arms and legs. 翻译：科林翻了个身，他的脸埋进枕头里。他继续嚎叫并开始捶打他棍子似的胳膊和腿。 案例4 As she approached, he put his fingers to his lips to warn her to be quiet. 翻译：当她走近时，他把手指放在嘴唇上，警告她要安静。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①伸出手 ②摸出； 掏出 ③打手势 ④敲门 ⑤指向某物 ⑥举手 ⑦按;压 ⑧用手掌打 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ① (她的手指穿过我的头发抚摸着)，and said,“ Of course there is a Santa Clause.” ②它(飞机)离得越近，她就越疯狂地挥动那件黄色的上衣。 ③那人拿起麻袋，把手伸进口袋，把四个硬币放在鲁本的手里。 ④她一句话也没说，只是露出了一丝淡淡的笑容，紧紧地握住了我的手。 ⑤他紧紧地捏着我的手腕，弄痛了我的手腕。 ⑥他把手伸进口袋，拿出了一张便条。 ⑦布朗太太指着墙上挂着的阿尔伯特·爱因斯坦的名言。 ⑧他拍拍我的头问：“有没有你特别想要的?” ⑨我惊呆了，站起来，给了她一个尴尬的拥抱。 ⑩她摸索着找钥匙，她的心跳比一匹疾驰的马还快。 (四)通过身体部位对人物心理的描写 人物的心理描写是指在文章中对特定场景中的人物的整体心理状态进行描写，体现人物的情绪。心理描写往往通过内心独白、行动暗示、环境描写等进行渲染。这里我们将通过对身体部位的描写来展现人物的心理。常见的可以用来展现人物心理，与身体部位相关的名词有： blood, vein, wrist, pulse, chest, cheek, breast, brain, throat, shoulder, lip, fist, tongue, palm, thumb, jaw, finger, heart, face, eyes, sweat; 与身体部位相关的动词有: stamp, stomp(跺脚), beat, drum, wave, drop, nod, raise, shake, tremble, be buried in, cover, dance, bow, faint, shrug(耸肩), choke, a wave of … sweep over, surge through等。 案例1 His face went bright red and he made a strange spluttering noise. 翻译：他的脸涨得通红，发出了一种奇怪的响声。 案例2 I had knocking knees, cold feet, and goose pimples big as goose eggs. 翻译：我膝盖打颤，双脚冰冷，浑身鸡皮疙瘩和鹅蛋一样大。 案例3 Sometimes I was hot and bothered. Sometimes I was in a cold sweat. 翻译：有时我很热，心烦意乱的。有时我浑身冒冷汗。 案例4 He was singing louder and louder, stomping his feet and playing faster and faster. 翻译：他唱的声音越来越响，跺脚打拍子，和着演奏的乐曲越来越快。 小试牛刀 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①心跳加速 ②满脸通红 ③颤抖的双唇 ④低着头 ⑤扬起眉毛 ⑥怒火中烧 ⑦喉咙哽咽 ⑧以手掩面 (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①他的声音因愤怒而颤抖。 ②令人难忘的是，她的眼睛像钻石一样闪闪发光，嘴角稳稳地挂着微笑。 ③她抽泣着，把脸埋在手里。 ④她的脸变得苍白，站在那里说不出话来。 ⑤她的心跳如此剧烈，几乎使她感到窒息。 ⑥“什么? 真傻啊！”玛丽感到一阵愤怒席卷了她。 ⑦她大步走到尖叫的男孩跟前，跺着她的脚。 ⑧他开始吹起了口哨。 ⑨她浑身发抖，感觉如坐针毡。 ⑩他心中充满了恐惧。 二、场面描写 场面描写是以人物活动为中心的“动态”描写，是对许多人参加活动的场景描写。续写场面描写要做到有条不紊、主次明晰，既有全景的描述，也有细致的特写，要写出特定场合的气氛。我们可以从活动中的人物动作、表情及五种感官等方面进行细致描写，增加故事的真实性与动态感。接下来，我们按照不同场面的类型进行案例解析。 (一)动物追逐、狩猎 A frightened ha re dashed past. The dogs chased her across the bank and stream, then they all thundered across our field. As the huntsman followed, there was an awful shriek. The dogs had caught the hare! A huntsman held it up by its leg and everyone was pleased until they saw what was happening by the stream. Two horses had fallen, one in the stream and the other on the grass. A muddy wet r ider struggled out of the water but the second r ider lay still on the ground. 翻译：一只受惊的野兔飞奔而过。狗追着它穿过河岸和小溪，然后它们都轰隆隆地穿过我们的田地。猎人跟在后面，这时可怕的尖叫声传来。狗抓到了野兔！ 一个猎人拎着它的腿，举了起来。每个人都很高兴，直到他们看到溪边发生的事情。两匹马倒下了，一匹在小溪里，另一匹在草地上。一位满身是泥、湿漉漉的骑手挣扎着走出水面，但第二位骑手却躺在地上，一动不动。 (二)水上逃生、划船追逐 “ Quick!”I yelled. “ Back to the boat.” We leaped to our feet and ran. The Papuans chased us. They were armed with bows and arrows, and wore net s around their necks full of stones, which they threw at us. We reached the boat and shoved off, splashing into the waves. The Papuans yelled with rage and followed us into the water. Scrambling on board, we grabbed the oars and rowed for our lives. The Papuans ran along the shore to their canoes. Moments later they were paddling after us. Their canoes, made of tree trunks, were long and narrow and they were much faster than our little boat. 翻译：“快！”我大叫。“回到船上去。”我们跳起来跑了起来。巴布亚人在我们身后追。他们背着弓箭，脖子上挂着装满了石头的网，一个劲儿向我们扔石头。我们走到船前，猛冲而去，扑通一声冲进波涛中。巴布亚人怒吼着，跟着我们到了水里。我们争先恐后地上船，抓起桨，拼命地划。巴布亚人沿着海岸奔向他们的独木舟。过了一会儿，他们在我们后面划桨追了上来。他们用树干做的独木舟又长又窄，比我们的小船快得多。 的场面真实、生动，制造了紧张的气氛。同时，作者还用了简短的语言描写，运用了多种语法结构，增加了语言的层次感和丰富性。 (三)火中逃生、嘈杂混乱 The yard was noisy, and people were running around shouting to make themselves heard over the top of the roaring flames. Then, from inside the stable, came an awful crash. Where were James and Ginger? Seconds later they appeared from the burning building. Poor Ginger was coughing so badly she couldn't speak. The square pushed his way through the crowd.“ James, my brave lad, ” he said. “ Are you all right?” James shook his head. He couldn't speak either! By now the fire was blazing through the stable roof. 翻译：院子里很吵，人们跑来跑去，大声叫喊，为了让他们的声音能越过熊熊燃烧的火焰而被人听见。然后，从马厩里传来一声可怕的撞击声。詹姆斯和金哲呢? 几秒钟后，他们从着火的大楼里出现了。可怜的金哲咳嗽得厉害，说不出话来。乡绅挤过人群。“詹姆斯，我勇敢的小伙子，”他说。“你还好吗?”詹姆斯摇了摇头。他也说不出话来！ 这时，火已经从马厩的屋顶冒出来了。 (四)火灾发生、置身火海 In the middle of the night something woke me. The air was thick and choking and it stung my eyes. I could hardly breathe and I could hear Ginger coughing. Something strange was happening up there. There was a soft rushing noise and lots of crackles and snaps. By now the air was thick with smoke. It was very frightening and I knew there was danger. Danger was all around me but I was too terrified to move a step. Fresh air came rushing through the open stable door and I breathed it thankfully. But with the air, the rushing sound grew fiercer. Through the bars of my empty ha y rack, I saw a red light flickering on the wall. 翻译：半夜有东西吵醒了我。空气又浓又闷，刺痛了我的眼睛。我几乎喘不过气来，我能听到金哲的咳嗽声。上面发生了一些奇怪的事。有一种轻柔的呼呼声和大量的劈啪声。这时空气中弥漫着浓烟。这是非常可怕的，我知道有危险了。我周围到处都是危险，但我太害怕了，不敢移动一步。新鲜的空气从打开的马厩门冲进来，我感激地吸了口气。但是在空气中，急促的声音变得更加猛烈。通过空干草架的栏杆，我看见墙上闪烁着红光。 (五)牲口买卖、热闹集市 I was taken to a horse fair and it would have been fun, had my future not depended on it.There was plenty to see as the fair was packed with every kind of horse from tiny ponies to huge shires. Some animals were fit and healthy, while others were old or ruined by hard work. It was very noisy and people rushed here and there bargaining for a good deal. I wasn't used to the noise and bustle of the London streets and I felt nervous and anxious. 翻译：我被带到了一个马市，如果我的未来不依赖于它的话，那会很有趣的。集市上挤满了各种各样的马，从小马到巨大的夏尔马，有很多可看的地方。有些动物身体健康，而另一些动物则因艰苦的工作而衰老或被毁。集市很吵，人们跑来跑去地讨价还价。我不习惯伦敦街道的喧嚣和吵闹，感到紧张和焦虑。 (六)空袭之后、满目疮痍 Crown street was gone. Most of the houses had been flattened altogether. Those left standing were badly damaged. Boards covered missing windows and doors and broken furni- ture was stacked on the pavement. Crazy heaps of brick and plaster stood where houses had been. Household things lay everywhere. There was a broken cup, a wooden spoon, someone's old tin bowl, and a scorched photo of a baby— all scattered about. 翻译：皇冠街不见了。大多数房子都被夷为平地了。那些还矗立着的房屋也被严重损坏了。木板覆盖着丢失的窗户和门，破损的家具堆放在人行道上。房屋原先所在的地方是一堆乱七八糟的砖块和灰泥。家居用品到处都是。有一个破碎的杯子、一个木勺子、一个人的旧锡碗，还有一张烧焦的婴儿照片——散落一地。 (七)地震发生、房屋倒塌 It began with a low rumbling sound like thunder. Soon the rumbling grew into a roar. The ground shook and deep cracks opened up in the streets. Huge buildings collapsed, sending clouds of dust into the air. Within seconds the town of Izmit lay in ruins. Some people man- aged to escape and ran from their homes. Others were not so lucky. 翻译：它(地震)开始于低沉的隆隆声，像雷声。不久，隆隆声就变成了咆哮声。地面震动，街道上裂开了深深的裂缝。巨大的建筑物倒塌，滚滚的尘埃升入空中。几秒钟之内，伊兹米特镇就成了废墟。一些人设法逃出了他们的家。其他人就没那么幸运了。 (八)精彩进球、激动人心 The teams kicked off again. And, before the Vernon team had finished arguing, Spanner sent Del his first straight pass of the evening. With the ball under perfect control, Del swerved left, and then right, past four defenders. Then he fooled the goal keeper into diving the wrong way and ran neatly past him. The defenders all ran at him, desperately. Spanner was charging up alone on the other side like a mad horse. Del carefully sidefooted the ball right across the face of the goal. Spanner could not miss from less than a metre out. 翻译：两队又开球了。弗农队还没来得及结束争论，斯潘纳就给德尔传了他晚上的第一次直传球。凭借完美的控球技术，德尔左转，然后右转，越过四名后卫。然后，他愚弄了守门员，让他往错误的方向扑去，然后干脆利落地从他身边跑过去。防守队员们都拼命地冲向他。斯潘纳像一匹疯马一样独自一人冲到另一边。德尔小心地用脚侧踢，球从球门前划过。斯潘纳不可能错过这个(离球门)不足一米的球。 小试牛刀 根据汉语完成句子。 ①体育场爆发了难以置信的喊叫声。 ②斯潘纳被兴奋的队伍围住了，他绕着球场蹦蹦跳跳，挥舞着手臂，大喊大叫。 ③他立刻跳上我的马鞍，追了起来。 ④ (受到惊吓), Lizzie kicked out, then bolted with (可怜的安妮夫人紧紧抓着) for dear life. ⑤我跟在她后面疾驰，但路是曲折的，她不停地消失在视线之外。 ⑥ (她一跃跳过沟渠), but stumbled on landing and fell heavily. ⑦They both heaved at it, ( 喘着气，用力地推着，直到门在一团尘土和石块中脱落下来). 三、环境描写 环境描写是指对人物所处的具体的社会环境和自然环境的描写。社会环境是指特定的时代背景及人物生活环境。自然环境是指自然界的景物，如季节更替、气候变化、风霜雨雪、山川湖海、森林原野、日月星辰等。我们在读后续写的环境描写中更多的是对自然环境的描写，通过自然环境来交代故事发生的背景，烘托人物心情。 (一)天气阴沉 Once on a dark winter's day, the yellow fog hung so thick and heavy in the streets of Lon- don that the lamps were lighted. A strange- looking little girl sat in a cab with her father and was driven rather slowly through the streets. 翻译：冬季晦暗的一天，黄色的雾笼罩着伦敦的街道，浓重而阴沉，人们点起了灯。一个模样奇怪的小姑娘跟爸爸坐在一辆出租马车里，慢慢地行驶在街道上。 (二)炎热潮湿 The air was hot and steamy and filled with the scent of flowers, thousands of them. 翻译：空气炎热而潮湿，充满了成千上万的花香。 (三)风雨交加 Black clouds hurried across the sky, and the trees moved wildly in the wind. The rain made a loud noise on the window. 翻译：乌云在天空中匆匆飘过，树在狂风中猛烈地摇摆。雨打在窗子上弄出了很大的响声。 (四)清冷的夜 It was a fine dry night; frost in the air; the streets as clean as a ballroom floor; the lamps, unshaken, by any wind, drawing a regular pattern of light and shadow. 翻译：那是一个明朗无雾的夜，霸气凛人；街道像舞厅地板一样干净，没有一丝风摇撼灯光，因此，路灯画出的光影线条分明。 (五)落日红霞 Some days the sunsets would be purple and pink. And some days they were a blazing orange setting fire to the clouds on the horizon. 翻译：有时落日泛起紫红的余晖，有时散发出橘红色的火光，燃起天边的晚霞。 (六)山中晨景 He rubbed his eyes— it was a bright sunny morning. The birds were hopping and twitter- ring among the bushes, and the eagle was wheeling aloft and breasting the pure mountain breeze. 翻译：他擦了擦眼睛，知道现在已经是阳光明媚的早晨。鸟儿在树丛中欢唱，老鹰迎着一阵阵清新的山风在空中盘旋。 (七)大雪纷飞 The weather has changed. The snow fell thick and fast, covering the roads, the roofs, the trees in the gardens, the front steps, the carriages, and the horses. 翻译：天气变了。鹅毛大雪漫天飞舞，盖没了道路，盖没了屋顶，盖没了花园里的树木，盖没了门前的台阶，盖没了马车，盖没了马背。 (八)壮阔海面 The clouds over the land now rose like mountains and the coast was only a long green line with the gray blue hills behind it. The water was a dark blue now, so dark that it was almost purple. 翻译：这时，陆地上升起了山一般的云，海岸成了一条绿色的长线，背后映衬着几座灰蓝色的小山。此时，海水已经变成了深蓝色，深得几乎发紫。 (九)室内布局 All of those things were in this spacious room, though each was slightly different from those in his own dwelling. The fabrics on the upholstered chairs and sofa were slightly thicker and more luxurious; the table legs were not straight like those at home, but slender and curved, with a small carved decoration at the foot. The bed, in an alcove at the far end of the room, was draped with a splendid cloth embroidered over its entire surface with intricate de- signs. 翻译：所有这些都在这个宽敞的房间里，虽然每个都与他自己的住宅略有不同。软垫椅子和沙发上的面料略厚，更奢华；桌腿不像家里那样直，但是修长而弯曲，脚上有一个小雕刻装饰。床铺在房间远端的壁龛里，整个表面绣有精美的布料，图案复杂。 根据汉语完成句子。 ①However, (湖水像玻璃般闪烁发光) in the setting sun and looked wonderful. (人教版 Book 1, Unit 3) ② (在山谷里，五颜六色的蝴蝶环绕着我们翩翩飞舞) and we saw many yaks and sheep eating green grass. (人教版 Book 1, Unit 3) ③ (这片土地被高大的树木覆盖，许多高达几十米), mingled with swaying palms, white orchids and green ferns. ④I saw kingfishers, parrots and cockatoos of all colors. And in a clearing, (我看到了几只有着长长的、色彩鲜艳的羽毛的鸟，在优美地跳着圆圈舞). ⑤星星在漆黑的夜空中闪烁，空气又脆又冷。 ⑥玛丽沿着小径一直走到大花园，那里有宽阔的草坪和蜿蜒的小路。 ⑦这里常春藤疯狂地生长，像瀑布一样拖到地上。 ⑧一天早晨，玛丽醒来，发现明亮的阳光洒满了她的房间。 ⑨一阵狂风吹起了常春藤，像窗帘一样把它分开了。 ⑩冬天来得早，天气冷得要命，到处都是雪和雨夹雪。 四、创写片段 模仿是为了运用，我们通过大量的阅读，积累了丰富的素材，但最终需要运用到自己的作品中。在前文部分，我们详细讲述了细节描写的微技能，接下来，我们主要通过片段的创写，引导学生掌握细节描写微技能，实现从词到句再到篇的自然过渡。 1.描写考试过后去教师办公室的情景(你可以考虑描写人物本身或者周围的环境来丰富内容)。 2.描写放学回家时学生涌出校门的情景(你可以考虑从宏观描写整体效果和从微观描写某个人)。 3.描写一次学生集体活动，野外宿营的场景(你可以考虑在描写中加入其他元素来丰富内容)。 4.描写一次打斗的场景(你可以考虑在描写中加入其他元素来丰富内容)。 5.描写暴风雨来临前的一个情景(你可以考虑在描写中加入其他元素来丰富内容)。 答案 一、人物描写 (一)通过身体部位对人物外貌的描写 1.对人物的全身进行描写 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①straight ②well- dressed ③of medium size ④middle- aged woman ⑤in rags ⑥tall and handsome ⑦a good figure ⑧( be) in uniform (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①a tall figure ②in his thirties ③I was walking in the park when a fat man in rags came up to me. ④Her figure was long and slim ⑤Standing behind the girl was a woman well past forty. She was more than fat, her ck legs shook as they moved. 2.对人物的脸部进行描写 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①round faced ②wide- eyed ③high- nosed ④a stubbly chin ⑤thick brows ⑥rosy cheeks ⑦ordinary- looking ⑧wrinkled face (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①had a large hooked nose ②The strong dark eyebrows give his face an oddly fierce look. ③He is smart and well- dressed but not good- looking. ④The doctor straightened up and turned around: thick blonde hair, a wide square faced a strong jaw. ⑤her big, dark eyes like beads 3.对人物的肤色及头发进行描写 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①long- haired ②shoulder- length ③dark- skinned ④curly short hair ⑤tattooed skin ⑥glossy hair (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①The woman had shoulder- length reddish hair and pale freckled skin. ②He was short and fat with a sandy- colored moustache, a freckled forehead and hardly any hair. ③with long, straight hair, chestnut- coloured ④His wavy hair was too long ⑤Her wavy hair is natural, just a nice light brown. ⑥Her hair was thick, glossy (二)通过身体部位对人物神态的描写 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①grin ②simper③smirk ④chuckle ⑤sneer/ mock ⑥giggle ⑦tears stream down ⑧a blank expression ⑨absent/ distant look ⑩burst into tears (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①Miss Daisy turned to him with a face as black as thunder. ②He looked up at me with a scowl. ③Molly turned away and gazed off into space, a faraway look in her eyes. ④When I recalled the happy moment with Grandma,I couldn't help but burst into tears/ tears streamed down my cheeks. ⑤Then, an even gloomier look spread across his face ⑥Mr. Peck went a very pale colour. Somehow he managed/ forced a smile. ⑦Suddenly a torch beam shone in their eyes. ⑧They all had their mouths open. ⑨He was grinning from ear to ear. ⑩Dolly stood there, looking sad and stunned. (三)通过身体部位对人物动作的描写 1.脚部动作 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①creep ②march ③stagger/ stumble ④tiptoe ⑤charge ⑥scamper ⑦wander ⑧limp ⑨gallop ⑩thunder (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①jump to my feet; the first rat sprang at me ②I was going to walk past; jumped down and bounded up to me ③Poor Reuben lay in the cart, cold as stone, while I painfully hobbled behind. ④I found Mark at the hospital, pacing restlessly up and down. ⑤She scrambled down the tree as quickly as she could. 2.嘴部动作 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①stammer ②murmur ③ scream/ screech ④gasp/ pant ⑤mumble/ mutter ⑥comment ⑦criticize ⑧admit ⑨complain/ grumble ⑩whisper (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①Mary stammered ②Colin demanded ③It's a matter of life and death; said Nemo shortly ④Ned said sourly, pointing at all the fish ⑤shouted in a cracked voice 3.眼部动作 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①at the sight of ②glare at ③lose sight of ④gawp ⑤focus one's eyes on ⑥witness ⑦peep at ⑧shoot/ have a look (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①Singing happily, she gazed at her surroundings with large, innocent eyes. ②When he finished, he raised/ lifted his eyes and looked out the window. ③Swallowing hard, I stared into Meghan's eyes for a long moment, wondering how I could cope with it. ④I watched helplessly, as the woman felt more and more frustrated and hopeless. ⑤She had spotted a man pacing down the hall. ⑥Putting his ladder against the wall, he climbed and peered over. ⑦The three of them shot her grateful looks and disappeared. 4.手部动作 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①reach out ②fish out ③signal/ gesture ④knock at/ on the door ⑤point at/ to sth. ⑥raise one’s hand ⑦press ⑧slap (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①She stroked her fingers through my hair ②The nearer it got, the more she waved the yellow blouse wildly. ③The man took the sacks, reached into his pocket and placed four coins in Reuben's hand. ④She didn’t say a word, but smiled a slight smile and held my hand tightly. ⑤He was squeezing my wrist so hard that it ached. ⑥He reached into his pocket and withdrew a note. ⑦Mrs. Brown pointed to the quotation from Albert Einstein hanging on the wall. ⑧He patted my head, and inquired:“ Is there anything particular you want?” ⑨Stunned,I stood up and gave her an awkward hug/ hugged her in an awkward way. ⑩She fumbled for the key, her heart beating faster than a galloping horse. (四)通过身体部位对人物心理的描写 (1)根据汉语写出单词。 ①one's heart races/ beats fast ②one's face flushes ③shaky/ trembling lips ④lower/ drop one’s head ⑤raise one’s eyebrows ⑥burn with anger ⑦a lump in one’s throat ⑧bury one’s face in the hands (2)根据汉语完成句子。 ①His voice trembled with anger. ②Unforgettable were her eyes that sh one like diamonds and lips held in a steady smile. ③She sobbed, hiding her face in her hands. ④Her face turned pale and stood there tongue- tied. ⑤Her heart beat so violently that she felt nearly suffocated. ⑥“ What? How silly!” Mary felt a wave of anger sweep over her. ⑦She strode up to the screaming boy and stamped her foot. ⑧He began to whistle a tune. ⑨She shook all over, feeling like sitting on pins and needles. ⑩A flood of fear welled up in him. / Fear flooded over him. 二、场面描写 根据汉语完成句子。 ①The stadium exploded with yells of disbelief. ②Spanner was mobbed by the excited team as he bounded round the pitch waving his arms and shouting. ③Immediately, he leaped into my saddle and gave chase. ④Badly startled; poor Lady Anne hanging on ⑤I galloped after her but the road was twisty and she kept going out of sight. ⑥She cleared the ditch in one leap ⑦gasping and straining until the door came away in a cloud of dust and stones 三、环境描写 根据汉语完成句子。 ①the lakes shone like glass ②In the valleys colourful butterflies flew around us ③The land was covered in enormous trees, many tens of metres tall ④I saw several birds with long, brilliantly colored feathers, swooping around in graceful circles ⑤Stars twinkled in the black night sky and the air was crisp and cold. ⑥Mary walked along the pathway until she came to huge gardens with wide lawns and winding walks. ⑦The ivy grew wild here, trailing like a waterfall down to the ground. ⑧One morning Mary woke to find bright sunshine flooding her room. ⑨A strong gust of wind lifted the ivy, parting it like a curtain. ⑩Winter came early and it was bitterly cold with lots of snow and sleet. 四、创写片段 1. Finally, it was time to face the music. I struggled to my feet from my seat and slowly made my way to the door. I was soon greeted with a stream of cold air rushing through the open door. I went along the dimly lit hallway. A sudden gust of cold wind made me shiver. It was really cold outside, I thought. After what seemed a long time, I came to the office. Through the glass window I could see Mr. Xu in front of a computer, eyes glued to the screen. I could even hear his fingers hitting the keyboard hard from time to time. After a minute's hesitation,I pushed the door open. Mr. Xu looked away from his computer, adjusted his glasses and stared directly into my eyes. My cheeks were glowing with embarrassment. I could figure out what he was to say. My heart missed a beat. My mind went blank and my mouth dry. 2. It was finally Saturday today! There was still five minutes left before the bell rang.But obviously everyone had run out of their patience anxiously waiting with little attention on what the teacher was saying. Upon the ringing of the bell, the whole school boiled. Some quick- acting students grabbed their already- prepared school bags and dashed out of the class- room like an arrow being shot from the bow. The teaching building was shaking, first gently with one or two footsteps dashing downstairs, then violently with more and more footsteps joining in, like a stampede of horses racing against each other for the exit. 3. Last weekend, we went camping in the nearest forest. Though the weather is not so pleasant, I didn't mind. It was lovely to swap the city for the sweet country air. A st ream ran between our camping area and the infinite forest whose running sound became the background of our laughter. I took part in various kinds of activities. We chased after each other as if we were young colts, we picked up flowers as a gift to our newly- made friends and we chatted with excitement under the awesome apple tree. It came as a great surprise to me when the organizer said that we would hold a bonfire party. Our voices rose with excitement. Finally came the par- ty. There was a soft rushing noise and lots of crackles and snaps. The fire was blazing to- wards the sky. We campers skipped excitedly around the fire, singing loudly. Overhead, stars twinkled in the black night sky and the air was crisp and cold, but my heart couldn't be warm- er. I'd never forgot that gay experience. 4. A shiver of fear ran up his spine. Jamie opened his mouth to say something, but before he could utter a single word, a broad hand took hold of his neck and he felt himself jerked to his feet. A voice boomed behind him:“ You leave out of my place, now!” It was the innkeeper. He crooked an arm round Jamie’s throat and crushed him against his greasy apron. Jamie kicked out and flailed his arms but it was no use. The innkeeper, giant and stout, his face twisted with rage, hauled him backwards to the door and swung him out into the night. He twisted through the air and landed with a thud in the street. A sharp pain began to throb in his leg and his head hurt. After two or three more minutes he let out a long sigh and struggled painfully to his feet and shook himself. 5. Peter was a businessman. Early one morning, Peter was on a business trip in his carriage when the weather quickly grew worse. The trees swayed wildly as the wind tore through them and soon the cab was pelted with twigs and leaves. Suddenly there was a terrible cracking noise. Overhead an oak tree groaned, then crashed to the ground. Its ripped- up roots land- ed right in front of the horse. Badly startled, the horse reared up, then she kicked and was too scared to calm down. Jack, who had been the head ostler, didn't even take any measures. As a result, the out- of- control cart smashed into a tree and he flew to the ground. Shocked and badly bruised, it took several attempts before Peter struggled to his feet. 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 $$