Continuation Writing（读后续写）- How to be coherent in plot building（如何构建连贯情节）

读后续写 ①On Monday morning I wore my favourite dress to school for the first time since I had started at Edison Middle School. I said good morning to our headmaster, Mr. Jordan, at the school entrance. With a genuine smile that reached his eyes, he greeted me by name, inquiring about my weekend and showing a sincere interest in my day ahead. ②That was really comforting! It was the day of the poetry festival, and I was excited. At my old school, I had won the poetry award every year. I’m horrible at sports, and too shy to be popular—but I do write good poetry, although I never told anyone here about it yet. ③The poem I wrote for the Edison Festival was about my dad. I wished I would surprise my classmates and Mrs. Baker, my English teacher. ④When Mrs. Baker called on me, I was so nervous that I had to swallow about ten times before l could speak, But once I started, I didn’t even bother to look at my paper. I’d spent so much time perfecting the rhymes that I knew the poem by heart. ⑤I had just started the third line when I noticed Mrs. Baker’s expression change. She looked at me with a mixture of appreciation and disbelief. I stopped in the middle of a word and waited for her to say something. ⑥“Linda, you are supposed to be reading a poem you made up yourself, not reciting something you learned. That is called plagiarism!” ⑦“Oh, but it’s an original one. I did make it up; it’s about my dad.” I heard a “Yeah, right!” from somewhere behind me, and someone else laughed. I opened my mouth to explain, but no words came out. ⑧“Perhaps you could step out and gather your thoughts, and when you feel ready, we can discuss this with a clear mind,” said Mrs. Baker. ⑨I’d been standing outside for 5 minutes when Mr, Jordan came over to ask me what happened. Para. 1: Almost in tears, I poured out the whole story. ______________________________ Para. 2: Inspired by his words, I gathered my courage and turned back to the classroom. _____________________ 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 $$ How to be coherent in plot building? 教学设计 Teaching Objective: 1. Students recall the given part of the continuation writing and sort out the story elements; 2. Based on the conflicts of the story, students plot the ending and the theme of the story, and get Tip 1 “Follow the “Conflict→Solution” pattern” and Tip 2 “Base the theme on the root of the conflict”; 3. Based on the evidence in the given part, students plot the second paragraph and get Tip 3 “Echo the evidence and make your writing specific”; 4. Based on reasonable imagination, students plot the first paragraph, and get Tip 4 “Put yourself in other’s shoes and make your writing realistic”; 5. Students evaluate and polish a sample writing to practice the four tips they get. Teaching Procedures 1. Lead-in Talk about how to better a continuation writing. Learn the criteria of scoring a continuation writing. 2. Recall the Story Students recall the key story elements. 3. Plotting Students answer the questions and figure out how the continued part should echo the given part in order to be coherent. 1. What will happen in the end? Tip 1: Follow the “Conflict→Solution” pattern. 2. What message does the story convey? (theme) Tip 2: Base the main theme on the root of the conflict. 3. How could the ending happen? Who is the key character to make the ending happen? Is there any evidence about my talent and the poem’s being original? Why did the teacher misunderstand me? Tip 3: Echo the evidence and make your writing specific. 4. “I” had an obvious emotional change between Paragraph 1 and Paragraph 2, how could “I” make the change? What did Mr. Jordan do and say? Tip 4: Put yourself in other’s shoes and make your writing realistic. 4. Practice Students observe one sample writing and find out whether its ending, theme and plot are reasonable. Students give their comments and improvements on the sample writing and discuss with their group members, using the checklist below. Then they make presentations. Checklist □ The writing follows the “Conflict→Solution” pattern. (At the end, Mrs. Baker apologized to me and I really surprised the teacher and students with my talent.) □ The writing bases the main theme on the root of the conflict. (The writing takes confidence and courage as the theme.) □ The writing is specific. (The writing echoes the evidence to prove “myself”.) □ The writing is realistic. (The writing is realistic in describing Mr. Jordan’s comfort.) Homework Students exchange their writings and improve them with the suggestions from their group members, using the checklist. 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 $$读后续写之情节构建 ContinuationWriting ---Plot Building —How to be coherent in plot building? 读后续写评分参考 评价读后续写的质量主要从内容、词汇语法和篇章结构三个方面考虑，具体为: (1)创造内容的质量，续写的完整性以及与原文情境的融洽度; (2)使用词汇和语法结构的准确性、恰当性和多样性; (3)上下文的衔接和全文的连贯性。 考生应根据自己对原材料的理解，发挥想象力和表达力，认真考虑以上三方面内容，完成题目任务，充分展示自己的英语写作能力。 coherent Echo the given part of the story when building plot 读后续写评分原则解读 评分原则（scoring principles） 1.本题总分为25分,按5个档次给分。 2.评分时,先根据所续写短文的内容和语言初步确定其所属档次,然后以该档次的要求来衡量、确定或调整档次，最后给分。 3.词数少于130的,从总分中减去2分。 4.评分时,应主要从以下四个方面考虑: (1)与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度;(2)内容的丰富性; (3)应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性;(4)上下文的连贯性。 5.拼写与标点符号是语言准确性的一个重要方面,评分时,应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑。 6.如书写较差以致影响交际,可将分数降低一个档次。【各档次的给分范围和要求] 3 读后续写作文各档次给分范围和要求解读 第五档:(21-25分) 1.与所给短文融洽度高,与所提供各段落开头语衔接合理。 2.所使用语法结构和词汇丰富、准确,可能有些许错误,但完全不影响意义表达。 3.有效地使用了语句间的连接成分,使所续写短文结构紧凑。 融洽度高 衔接合理 丰富 结构紧凑 coherence 连贯性 4 续写情节构建中存在的问题 1. 文章理解不到位，续写情节与原文脱离 2. 违背真实生活，缺乏合理性 3. 融洽度不高，衔接不合理 4. 大量对话无意义，段落间分布不均衡 5. 主题升华牵强或跑偏 6 读后续写情节建构的应对策略 策略一 研读文本，梳理双线 策略二 确定主题，围绕核心 策略三 揣摩首句，推理情节 策略四 捕捉伏笔，前后呼应 策略五 流畅衔接，语意连贯 策略六 丰富情节，升华主题 Recalling Plotting for the end of the story I justified myself and Mrs. Baker apologized for her prejudice. I surprised my teacher and classmates with my talent. What will happen in the end? Plotting for the end Writing Tip 1: Follow the “Conflict→Solution” pattern. I justified myself and Mrs. Baker apologized for her prejudice. I surprised my teacher and classmates with my talent. Plotting for the end What message does the story convey? Be brave to prove yourself when facing misunderstanding. Have confidence in yourself. Writing Tip 2: Base the theme on the root of the conflict. Plotting for Paragraph 2 I justified myself and Mrs. Baker apologized for her prejudice. I surprised my teacher and classmates with my talent. Plotting for Para.2 How could the ending happen? Ending Plotting for Para.2 competent inspiration creating process Evidence about my talent and the poem’s being original? ② ③ ④ Plotting for Para.2 Why did the teacher misunderstand me? ② ④ ⑤ too nervous She didn’t know my talent. too good to be true tell her my awards/ inspiration/ creating process be confident I justified myself and Mrs. Baker apologized for her prejudice. I surprised my teacher and classmates with my talent. Plotting for Para.2 How could the ending happen? Ending tell her my awards/ inspiration/ creating process be confident when reciting Writing Tip 3: Echo the evidence and make your writing specific. 捕捉伏笔，前后呼应 伏笔（foreshadowing）是指在记叙、描写的过程中，对将要在文中出现的与中心有必然联系的人物、事件，预先做出揭示或暗示，并在事件发展的另一阶段与之呼应的一种表现手法。 If in the first act you have hung a gun on the wall, then in the following act it should be fired. Otherwise don’t put it there. ---Anton Pavlovich Chekhov  情节伏笔 细节伏笔 ——那些悬而未决的事 ——动作、心理、环境、对话、神态等 如果在第一幕中你把枪挂在墙上，那么在下一幕中，它应该被开火。否则不要把它放在那里 ——安东·巴甫洛维奇·契诃夫 Plotting for Paragraph 1 Plotting for Para.1 How could I make the change? Para.1 Para.2 What did Mr. Jordan do and say? sad/ helpless comforted/ brave/ confident/ prepared How to comfort one? With empathy (to feel the same feelings) My change sad/ helpless comforted nervous brave & confident Mr. Jordan _____________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ Mr. Jordan _____________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________ What did Mr. Jordan do and say? hint: His expression? gesture? words? My change sad/ helpless comforted nervous brave & confident listened and empathized my sadness praised my talent offered advice for my reciting encouraged me to prove myself Mr. Jordan: Mr. Jordan: Writing Tip 4: Put yourself in other’s shoes and make your writing realistic. What did Mr. Jordan do and say? Given Part Continued Part 续写段1：... 就地取材，文字接龙（Para1首句） 2. 3. 4. 5. 就地取材，反向文字接龙（Para2首句） 续写段2：... 就地取材，文字接龙（Para2首句） 交代结局：问题解决（符合价值观结局） 10.点睛升华：价值观/感叹 读懂5W1H1E--构建情节--写大纲：“十句五定法” 承上启下 顺接故事，升华主题 调配演员，描写情绪 动作/环境/语言 关键情节（由角色特点决定） 关键情节（同时空，各个角色做什么） 动作/环境/语言 设疑并解答， 动作情绪和“对话” “十句五定” 剩下的五句补齐细节【所见，所闻，所说，所做，所思+万能拥抱加哭泣（混分句式）】 续写语料库【常考主旨升华+环境描写】 1.所见：At the sight of sth, sb. 2.所闻：Upon hearing the news that..., sb. 3.所说：“...”said sb.,”...” 4.所做：【动作链+动作面/简单陈述】 sb. did sth, and did sth【并列几个谓语】 sb. did sth.,v-ing【谓语+非谓语】 5.所思 It was at the moment that sb. realized that... It suddenly occurred to sb. that... 所见 所说 所感 所思 外貌描写 环境描写 语言描写 动作描写 心理描写 情感描写 所见 所做 所感 Appearance/ Surroundings Conversations/Languages Behavior/Actions/Verbs Emotions/ Feelings Use the descriptive techniques to enrich the details 创设情节 突出主题 25 Practice Sample Writing End? Theme? Specific? Realistic? or Evaluate—Discuss—Polish—Share Group Work At the end, Mrs. Baker apologized to me and I really surprised the teacher and students with my talent. The writing takes confidence and courage as the theme. The writing echoes the evidence to prove “myself”. The writing is realistic in describing Mr. Jordan’s comfort. Let’s Share! Reflecting What skills have you learned about how to keep a continuation writing coherent in plot building? What was the most impressive thing that you learnt in this class? What problems did you have in learning this class? Overall, I thought my/ group members’ performance in this class was __________________. Homework Exchange and improve your own writings with the following checklist. Thanks! Lavf58.46.101 $$ How to be coherent in plot building? 导学案 Task 1: Recall the key story elements. Task 2: Plotting for the end of the story 1. What will happen in the end? Tip 1: 2. What message does the story convey? (theme) Tip 2: 3. How could the ending happen? Who is the key character to make the ending happen? Is there any evidence about my talent and the poem’s being original? Why did the teacher misunderstand me? Tip 3: 4. “I” had an obvious emotional change between Paragraph 1 and Paragraph 2, how could “I” make the change? What did Mr. Jordan do and say? Tip 4: Task 3: Give your comments and improvements on the sample writing and discuss with your group members. Using the checklist below. Then share with us. Checklist □ The writing follows the “Conflict→Solution” pattern. (At the end, Mrs. Baker apologized to me and I really surprised the teacher and students with my talent.) □ The writing bases the main theme on the root of the conflict. (The writing takes confidence and courage as the theme.) □ The writing is specific. (The writing echoes the evidence to prove “myself”.) □ The writing is realistic. (The writing is realistic in describing Mr. Jordan’s comfort.) Task 4: Improve your own writings with the checklist. 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 $$