14 对话描写模型-2025年高考英语读后续写高分技能提升

对话描写扩展模型 对话是故事角色之间的交流或内心独白，是故事叙述中的重要手段。在读后续写中，运用恰当的对话描写可以揭示人物性格、打破单调，为情节铺垫，推动故事发展。 对话 (dialogue) 是故事角色在整个故事中对彼此或对自己说的话。它可以用来揭示人物的性格和个性，它也可以用来推动情节向前发展，并展示情节发展的过程。我们需要用各种细节将主题编织进故事之中，让其不时地闪现，以展示故事的全部内涵。对话无疑是一种可以让全部内容显现出来的元素。人物在交谈、细语、呼喊、低吼、抱怨、讥讽、哀叹，而读者在倾听。相较于用枯燥的、阐释性的长篇大论去传达主题，对话这种方式不仅更快捷有效，而且更能激起读者的情感。对话描写需遵循以下原则： （1） 真实情感 在对人物进行对话描写时, 真情实感是贴切人物的最好表达, 尽量避免过于“高大上”或“假大空”, 脱离人物的真实身份。如: “You have had a sound sleep!” the old lady shouted. “It’s time to open your eyes! We’re in a risky situation and we will have a big deal to make!” 不难发现作者对老妇人的真情实感的描写, 体现了老妇人急迫的个性和对生活的不顺心而大发脾气的妇女形象。同时, 结合三个感叹句,更好地体现了老妇人的急躁的心理。由此, 读者也能够通过该对话, 体会到语言的美感。 （2） 描写比重 在对人物冲突中的具体的对话描写, 要注意在文中段落中的比重问题, 切忌以全对话或大部分对话代替其他细节描写, 要恰到好处，例如: “In the garden?” Sam asked nervously. “I actually have given all I have to you! So, please do not hurt me or kill me, I beg you!” Jessica also told the thief, “Do you want all our belongings? They are all in our bedroom. I will lead you to get them. Of course, we are rich and we have a lot of money. All will be given to you if you do not hurt or kill us, please, please!” The thief said, “Of course. I will not kill you too! OK. You are so good. I will not kill you if I get this. Give all to me now!” Just at that time, there was a knock at the door and the police came to the door. 从上一段的描写中我们不难发现, 几乎全段都是对话语言描写, 而且话语多次重复和啰嗦, 难以很好地表达主人公的内心情感, 也难以让读者体会到英语语言的美。所以, 在续写过程中,一定要读透文本, 理解文本中的语言特色, 保持语言的简洁性和一致性。 （3） 展现转变 从故事的开头至结尾，我们笔下的人物应该一直在发生改变，至少是微妙的改变。我们创作小说的原因之一便是展现人物如何变得更好或者更坏。要创作出一个颇具改造性的场景、使人物发生永久的改变并且令读者意识到这一点，我认为这并不是一件轻而易举的事情。要完成这件事，我们笔下的人物必须说出更多意味深长的话语。 “I guess this is it," he said. "I'll see you back home in a month, okay?”“The boy's mother turned to the dog, "Okay, Poppy, time to go back home.” 这里的两个对话,一个是小主人和小狗说再见,一个是女主人带小狗回家，都显示了这家主人对小狗的喜爱，完全把她当作家庭一员来对待。通过这两个对话，我们可推断, 小狗只知道自己和小主人再见了, 却不知道小主人一个月之后会回来的, 所以才有下文的闷闷不乐。而其中男孩对小狗说的 “I'll see you back home in a month.”这句话为下文的“A few weeks later, the boy arrived home from the university.”埋下伏笔。 1、 对话的基本构成 对话通常由引用部分、标点符号、对话提示语和其他成分构成。对话提示语如“said Winston”“he said”“he added”等，主语是名词时通常放在动词后，主语是代词时放在动词前。 例句： “When you were a young man, we were all living in the tree-tops,” said the barman, with a glance at the other customers. 中文翻译：酒保瞥了一眼其他顾客，说道：“你年轻时，我们都在树上生活。” 解释：通过对话提示语“said the barman”和动作“with a glance at the other customers”，增加了对话的生动性。 例句： “I can’t believe it’s already October,” she said, looking out the window. 中文翻译：她看着窗外，说道：“真不敢相信已经到十月了。” 解释：通过“looking out the window”增加了对话的背景和情感。 例句： “We need to leave now,” he said, checking his watch. 中文翻译：他看了看手表，说道：“我们现在得走了。” 解释：通过“checking his watch”增加了对话的紧迫感。 例句： “I’m so proud of you,” she said, hugging him tightly. 中文翻译：她紧紧地拥抱他，说道：“我真为你感到骄傲。” 解释：通过“hugging him tightly”增加了对话的情感表达。 2、 对话标点与结构 逗号位置：对话中的逗号要放在引号里面。例如：“And now I must go,” she said as soon as he had mastered his instructions. 提示词位置：提示词可放在引用对话的前、中、后。若在中间，其后需用逗号，后半句首字母小写。例如：“Don’t be late for supper,” Uncle Paul cried, “and keep to the track so that you don’t get lost!” 例句： “I’m not sure I can do this,” she said quietly. 中文翻译：她小声说道：“我不确定我能不能做到。” 解释：提示词“said quietly”放在句末，描述了说话的语气。 例句： “You must be joking,” he laughed, shaking his head. 中文翻译：他笑着说道：“你一定是在开玩笑。”一边摇了摇头。 解释：提示词“laughed”和动作“shaking his head”放在中间，增加了对话的生动性。 例句： “I can’t find my keys,” she said, searching her pockets. 中文翻译：她一边搜寻口袋，说道：“我找不到我的钥匙了。” 解释：提示词“said”和动作“searching her pockets”放在中间，增加了对话的背景。 例句： “We should go now,” he said, glancing at his watch. 中文翻译：他看了一眼手表，说道：“我们现在该走了。” 解释：提示词“said”和动作“glancing at his watch”放在中间，增加了对话的紧迫感。 3、 丰富对话的五种方法 （1） 增加副词 在对话提示词后增加副词，描绘说话人的语气情感，使对话更形象化。 例句： “You must have seen great changes since you were a young man,” said Winston tentatively. 中文翻译：温斯顿试探性地说：“你年轻时一定看到了许多变化。” 解释：副词“tentatively”（试探性地）描绘了说话人的谨慎语气。 例句： “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” she said doubtfully. 中文翻译：她怀疑地说：“我不认为那是个好主意。” 解释：副词“doubtfully”（怀疑地）描绘了说话人的不确定语气。 例句： “We should try it at least once,” he said enthusiastically. 中文翻译：他热情地说：“我们至少应该试一次。” 解释：副词“enthusiastically”（热情地）描绘了说话人的积极态度。 例句： “I’m really sorry about what happened,” she said apologetically. 中文翻译：她道歉地说：“我真的很抱歉发生了这样的事。” 解释：副词“apologetically”（道歉地）描绘了说话人的歉意。 （2） 并列动词 在对话中增加动作描写，增添画面感。 例句： “Seven minutes behind time,” he added, and shook his head. 中文翻译：他补充道：“晚了七分钟。”并摇了摇头。 解释：动作“shook his head”（摇了摇头）增加了画面感，使对话更生动。 例句： “I think we should go now,” she said, and looked at her watch. 中文翻译：她说道：“我想我们现在该走了。”一边看了看手表。 解释：动作“looked at her watch”（看了看手表）增加了对话的紧迫感。 例句： “I can’t believe you did that,” he said, and laughed. 中文翻译：他说道：“我不敢相信你居然做了那件事。”一边笑了起来。 解释：动作“laughed”（笑了起来）增加了对话的轻松感。 例句： “We need to talk about this,” she said, and sat down. 中文翻译：她说道：“我们需要谈谈这件事。”一边坐了下来。 解释：动作“sat down”（坐了下来）增加了对话的正式感。 （3） 增加介词短语 在对话提示词后增加介词短语，详细表现说话者的神态、语调、声音等具体情况。 例句： “You all remember,” said the Controller, in his strong deep voice. 中文翻译：管理者用他那深沉有力的声音说：“你们都记得。” 解释：介词短语“in his strong deep voice”（用他那深沉有力的声音）描绘了说话者的语调。 例句： “The Ministry of Plenty’s certainly done a good job this year,” he said with a knowing shake of his head. 中文翻译：他带着一种心知肚明的摇头说：“今年，丰饶部确实干得不错。” 解释：介词短语“with a knowing shake of his head”（带着一种心知肚明的摇头）描绘了说话者的神态。 例句： “I don’t think we should do that,” she said in a hesitant tone. 中文翻译：她用犹豫的语调说：“我不认为我们应该做那件事。” 解释：介词短语“in a hesitant tone”（用犹豫的语调）描绘了说话者的语气。 例句： “We should be more careful,” he said in a serious voice. 中文翻译：他用严肃的语调说：“我们应该更小心。” 解释：介词短语“in a serious voice”（用严肃的语调）描绘了说话者的语气。 （4） 增加分词短语 在对话中增加分词或分词短语表示伴随状况，不仅能够增添画面感，而且能够使句子结构更加复杂，表达更加丰富。 例句： “What are you giving them？” asked Mr. Foster, making his tone very professional. 中文翻译：福斯特先生使自己的语气听起来很专业，问道：“你在给他们什么？” 解释：分词短语“making his tone very professional”（使自己的语气听起来很专业）增加了对话的复杂性和画面感。 例句： “Yes,” said Mustapha Mond, nodding his head, “you may well shudder.” 中文翻译：穆斯塔法·蒙德点了点头，说道：“是的，你确实会感到恐惧。” 解释：分词短语“nodding his head”（点了点头）增加了对话的生动性。 例句： “I think we should leave now,” she said, glancing at the clock. 中文翻译：她看了一眼时钟，说道：“我想我们现在该走了。” 解释：分词短语“glancing at the clock”（看了一眼时钟）增加了对话的紧迫感。 例句： “I’m not sure I can do this,” he said, biting his lip. 中文翻译：他咬着嘴唇，说道：“我不确定我能不能做到。” 解释：分词短语“biting his lip”（咬着嘴唇）增加了对话的紧张感。 （5） 增加状语从句 在对话中增加从句，使得续写的语法结构更加复杂，同时，更细节化地表达说话人说话时的具体情况。 例句： “At last,” she thought exultantly as she stepped out of the cab. 中文翻译：她兴奋地想道：“终于到了。”一边走出了出租车。 解释：状语从句“as she stepped out of the cab”（一边走出了出租车）增加了对话的背景信息。 例句： “In the place where there is no darkness,” he said, as though he had recognized the allusion. 中文翻译：他说：“在没有黑暗的地方。”仿佛他认出了其中的典故。 解释：状语从句“as though he had recognized the allusion”（仿佛他认出了其中的典故）增加了对话的深度。 例句： “I think we should go now,” she said, as the rain began to fall. 中文翻译：她说道：“我想我们现在该走了。”雨开始下了。 解释：状语从句“as the rain began to fall”（雨开始下了）增加了对话的背景信息。 例句： “I’m really sorry about what happened,” she said, as tears filled her eyes. 中文翻译：她说道：“我真的很抱歉发生了这样的事。”眼泪涌上了她的眼睛。 解释：状语从句“as tears filled her eyes”（眼泪涌上了她的眼睛）增加了对话的情感表达。 综合演练： “If mum finds out that I'm going to the beach, I'll be in big trouble.” I said to myself softly in a low voice. I went downstairs slowly and tried to walk casually into the kitchen. As I was walking towards the back door, mum asked without looking up from her “dish-washing”, “Where are you going?” I answered back without hesitation,“ I am going to the garden to play.” After I got out of the kitchen, I breathed a sign of relief. My plan had worked out fine so far. I climbed the fence and jumped onto the muddy field next to my house and started running towards the bus stop at top speed. After half an hour I was at the beach scanning the crowd for my friends, Jimmy and Bobby. Two young men were racing in the canoes (独木舟). After a while, I saw them near a coconut tree. I ran towards them and got into my swimming trunk (游泳裤). For about an hour, we played volleyball happily. Suddenly, Bobby hit the ball too hard and the ball fell into the sea. Just as Bobby was going to pick up the ball, the tide came in and carried the ball further and further away from the shore. I wanted to show off my swimming skills so I declared to help get the ball for them. I dived into the water and started swimming at a steady pace. After swimming for about ten minutes, I became tired but when I saw that the ball was only a few feet away from me, I put in an extra burst of speed. However, just as I was going to get the ball, a very strong current swept the ball further away from me. At that moment, a string of weed (海草)tangled (缠绕) up with my feet and I could not swim properly. I struggled to keep afloat but it was no use. “ If I had listened to my parents, this would never have happened,”I thought silently. Paragraph 1 Finally, after struggling for a minute or two, I still got pulled underwater. ______________________________________________________________________________________ Paragraph 2 When I woke up, I was in an empty room lying on a bed. ______________________________________________________________________________________ 翻译小练习： 1. 我还是被推到水下。我告诉自己永远不要放弃。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 2. 然后我又使劲拔了一次草。杂草终于断了。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 3. 我游回水面深呼吸。我看见两个年轻人划着独木舟，互相比赛。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 4. 我筋疲力尽，大声呼救。那两个男人看见我就朝我划来。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 5. 当他们到达我这边时，我已经失去知觉了。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 6. 直到一位医生走进房间，我才意识到我在医院里。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 7. 吉米和鲍比告诉我，那两个年轻人把我带到岸边，送我去医院。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 8. 几分钟后，我的父母带着半生气半担心的表情走了进来。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 9. 我父母责骂我偷偷地跑出家门，但也很高兴我没有受重伤。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 10. 我永远不会忘记那可怕的经历。我也不想再炫耀了。 ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 参考答案： 1. 我还是被推到水下。我告诉自己永远不要放弃。 I still got putted underwater. I told myself I should never give up. 2. 然后我又使劲拔了一次草。杂草终于断了。 Then I pulled the weed again with great efforts. The weed finally broke. 3. 我游回水面深呼吸。我看见两个年轻人划着独木舟，互相比赛。 I swam back to the surface to take a deep breath. I saw two young men in canoes, racing each other. 4. 我筋疲力尽，大声呼救。那两个男人看见我就朝我划来。 I was exhausted and shouted for help. The two men saw me and raced towards me. 5. 当他们到达我这边时，我已经失去知觉了。 By the time they reached me, I had been already unconscious. 6. 直到一位医生走进房间，我才意识到我在医院里。 It was not until a doctor came into the room that I realized that I was in a hospital. 7. 吉米和鲍比告诉我，那两个年轻人把我带到岸边，送我去医院。 Jimmy and Bobby told me the two young men brought me to the shore and sent me to the hospital. 8. 几分钟后，我的父母带着半生气半担心的表情走了进来。 After a few minutes, my parents with half angry and half worried faces walked in. 9. 我父母责骂我偷偷地跑出家门，但也很高兴我没有受重伤。 My parents scolded me for running out of the house secretly but were also glad that I was not seriously injured. 10. 我永远不会忘记那可怕的经历。我也不想再炫耀了。 I will never forget that terrifying experience. Neither will I ever want to show off again. 参考范文： Paragraph 1 Finally, after struggling for a minute or two, I still got putted underwater. I told myself I should never give up. Then I pulled the weed again with great efforts. The weed finally broke. I swam back to the surface to take a deep breath. I saw two young men in canoes, racing each other. I was exhausted and shouted for help. The two men saw me and raced towards me. By the time they reached me, I had been already unconscious. Paragraph 2 When I woke up, I was in an empty room lying on a bed. It was not until a doctor came into the room that I realized that I was in a hospital. Jimmy and Bobby told me the two young men brought me to the shore and sent me to the hospital. After a few minutes, my parents with half angry and half worried faces walked in. My parents scolded me for running out of the house secretly but were also glad that I was not seriously injured. I will never forget that terrifying experience. Neither will I ever want to show off again. / 学科网（北京）股份有限公司 $$