读后续写之叙述与描写 课件-2025届高三下学期英语一轮复习专项

读后续写中的“描写” 什么是描写 PART ONE Description is painting a picture in words of a person, place, object or scene. A description essay is generally developed through sensory details, or the impressions of one’s senses--sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch. 描写是通过对各种感官的细节描述来刻画人、事与物。 描写≠叙述 叙述只需要陈述事情的来龙去脉和前因后果。 What is description? 1. When Hassan was crying, I tried my best to comfort her. 2. Later, in the dark, after the movie had started, I heard Hassan next to me, croaking. Tears were sliding down her cheeks. I reached across my seat, slung my arm around her, pulled her close. 识别描写与叙述 1. Her moistened eyes betrayed her unconcerned posture. 2. She lost control and the tears began to flow. 3. With tears streaming down her face, words failed her. 4. She would cry, kick and lie on the floor drumming with tears. 5. She was crying whe she heard the terrible news. 6. She rode the rest of the way home wearing a Mona Lisa of peace and grace. 7. They roared with laughter and Harry settled back in his seat, grinning from ear to ear. 8. As I stand it back, a huge smile spreads across her face, which lights up my gloomy afternoon. 9. Excitement took my breath away when he broke the news to me. 10. I was very angry when I got the news. 识别描写与叙述 D D D D N D D D N Twenty years ago, I drove a taxi for a living. One night I went to pick up a passenger at 2:30 a.m. When I arrived to collect, I found the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window. I walked to the door and knocked. “Just a minute,” answered a weak, elderly voice. After a long time, the door opened. A small woman in her eighties stood before me. By her side was a small suitcase. I took the suitcase to the car, and then returned to help the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly towards the car. She kept thanking me for my kindness. “It’s nothing,” I told her. “I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated.” “Oh, you’re such a good man.” She said. When we got into the taxi, she gave me an address, and then asked, “Could you drive through downtown?” “It’s not the shortest way,” I answered quickly. “Oh, I’m in no hurry,” she said. “I’m on my way to a hospice (临终医院). I don’t have any family left. The doctor says I don’t have very long time.” I quietly shut off the meter (计价器). For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked, the neighborhood where she had lived, and the furniture shop that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow down in front of a particular building and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing. At dawn, she suddenly said, “I’m tired. Let’s go now.” We drove in silence to the address she had given me. “How much shall I give you?” she asked. “Nothing,” I said. “You have to make a living,” she answered. “Oh, there are other passengers,” I answered. She said thanks to me, but she looked so sad. 注意： 1. 续写词数应为150左右； 2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。 Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. The next day, I was on my way to visit her. 案例1 1. 找出属于描写和叙述的句子 The next day, I was on my way to visit her. ①And I could see the particular buildings she had told me and took some photos. ②As I reached the hospital, the doctor in charge told me that she was healthy and relaxed and where she was. ③When I went into her room, I found she was sleeping gently, so I put the photos and fresh fruits and flowers on her desk. ④Saying nothing, I left a note written my number and went out of the hospice. ⑤Then I kept on driving a taxi to make a living and spreading my love to others. 全都是叙述 该段落在故事的逻辑性、完整性和衔接程度上没有问题。 但是该段落有11个“流水”动作和4个场景的切换(路上，到医院，去房间，离开)。快速的场景切换如走马观花。过多的动作分布于零散的时空之中，使得它们缺乏外在的连贯与内在的联系，同时分散了对主要场景即在医院房间和老人再次见面的刻画，难以触动人心。 如何定位描写 PART TWO 1. 树立定位意识 抓住文章主旨 根据两段首句找到两个切入点(如人，物，地点), 从两个切入点出发分别选一个场景，有针对性地直指主旨对人、事、物展开充分描写 2. 定位描写策略 根据主要人物动作定位 (What) 根据主要人物心情定位 (Changes of emotions) 叙述与描写共进 案例2 The next day, I was on my way to visit her. And I could see the particular buildings she had told me and took some photos. Her twinkling eyes seemed blinking in my mind, a smile lifting the corner of my mouth. Carrying with overwhelmed expectation, I finally reached her room. Delight more than surprise, she welcomed me warmly, even the air was refreshed with happiness. Undoubtedly, those photos afforded us a bright afternoon. Saying nothing, she reluctantly waved goodbye to me. 1. 文章主旨是什么？ 2. 该段落的重心也就是切入点是？ 3. 该段落的场景是？ 4. 勾画描写句子 5. 这个段落的描写如何？ 人与人间的关怀与爱 我>老人 定位在我到医院-在医院房间 1. 重心偏离 2.描写不生动形象，不太到位 文章主线：主要人物+主要事件+事件发生场景(主旨) 精准定位：定位场景是什么? 描写重心是什么？ 定位描写策略 根据主要人物动作定位 (What) 根据主要人物心情定位 (Changes of emotions) 定位描写策略 I went up to the roof for a break after studying for an hour and watched the 50 or so people swimming in the natural rock pool below our house. It was a sunny day—a blue, cloudless sky over a calm sea. But then, as I looked in the distance, I discovered a series of three or four big waves heading towards the shore. I’d seen these mini-tsunamis(海啸) many times before. They were heading at speed in the direction of the pool. Most people knew to look out for them, but from the screams that started coming from the beach, I could tell someone was in trouble. Without thinking, I ran down into the street, holding my bodyboard(俯伏冲浪板) on the way and shouted at a stranger to go inside my house and call the coastguard. My neighbourMoises had heard the screaming as well and was also outside with his bodyboard, so together we rushed to the steps that led down to the sea. Once we got closer,we discovered the waves had pulled a boy and a girl from the pool and into the open sea. I knew that the nearest boat would take at least 30 minutes to reach us. Waiting for help wasn't a choice. I wasn't used to this sort of emergency —I'd never been trained as a lifeguard一but I didn't think twice about trying to save them. I suppose in a way I wanted to impress everyone;at19,a deal like that can seem like a good opportunity to show off. Moises and I dived into the water and it took us 10 minutes to get to them. When we finally reached them.theywere almost lifeless with only their heads coming in and out of the water. We could tell they were still alive from their small breaths but it was clear that they wouldn't have been able to stay there much longer. I held the boy and pulled him over my board. Moises moved the girl onto his board. We discussed pushing them back to the shore, but we were too far out. 注意： 1. 续写词数应为150左右； 2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。 We had to wait. That night, word came from the hospital that the two people were in good condition. THANK YOU THANK YOU $$