第三部分 第二讲 读后续写的技法指导-【勤径学升】2025年高考英语一轮总复习晨背与写作（外研版）

高考一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标跟微信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 第二讲 读后续写的技法指导 技法一 精准解读文本 梳理完故事情节后，是不是马上就着手写了呢？ “So do I,"said Harry,“We really should do 答案是否定的。因为原文中出现的人、事、物等可能会 something to assist them." 涉及，所以我们还需要在了解原文情节的基出上，将 For some moments,John said nothing,but, 己抽离出来，针对原文的感情基调、人物关系、人物特 suddenly,he sprang to his feet and cried,"I have a 点和矛盾冲突进行分析，只有这样才可以避免出现续 great idea!I have a solution that we can all help 写的内容与原文自相矛盾或背道而驰的情况 accomplish(完成).” 技能1确定感情基调 从对话内容中的“I wish we could help him to 感情基调是指文章的感情色彩、情感取向，即作者 earn money,"及“We really should do something to 表达的情感态度，如：是幽默诙谐还是严肃、是欢快愉assist them.”可以看出孩子们听了母亲讲述小男孩家 悦还是伤感、是积极向上还是消沉。学生在进行续写里面临的困难后都想要帮助小男孩赚钱。同时，根据 前必须确定好感情基调，这样续写的情感方向才不会 文中其他孩子的回答，如“So do I,”及“I have a great 跑偏，才能与所给原文紧密结合。 idea!”可以看出孩子们也团结起来共同想办法来帮助 策略1：通过文中的形容词或动词把握感情基调 这个小男孩。因此可以确定文章的感情基调是互助友 [典例1] 爱、乐观积极的 (2022·浙缸卷节选)When Dr..Henderson was 策略3：通过所给段首句把握感情基调 assigning(指定)project mates for his psychology class,I[典例3] secretly hoped he would pair me with my best friend or at (2021·浙江卷节选)When I brought my least a classmate I could have some fun with...Dr. paycheck home-it was $119-my dad wanted to talk Henderson very deliberately matched everyone in class to me... and announced that I would be working with the one I was surprised that my dad allowed me to use person in elass I wanted to avoid. the money as I wished 根据选文的段首句提示可知，“我很惊讶，我的父 .Here was this challenging student who had a 亲允许我按照自己的意愿使用这笔钱。”也就是说，作 reputation for single-mindedness and good grades- 者的父亲不再要求作者将赚的钱贴补家用了。由此可 the exact opposite of me...I decided to stick to it no 推知，故事应该是父亲同意了作者自由支配报酬，作者 matter what. 也接受了在农场工作来为家庭做出贡献的美满结局。 通过选文的第-一段中的I wanted to avoid可以看 策略↓：通过环境描写把握感情基调 出作者并不想分到这位新队友，由此可推知作者的心 [典例4幻 理是抗拒的。同时，原文中stick to it表明作者虽然不 (2018·折江卷节选)It was summer,and my dad 想和他成为队友，但是仍然坚持下去，由此可推知作者 wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before.He 的心理是坚毅的。由此可以确定，原文本的感情基调 decided to take me on a trip to the Wild West. 是积极的，故事的结局极有可能是作者改变了对队友 tE1 的看法。 ..It was so peaceful and quiet and the colors of 策略2：通过文中对话把握感情基调 the brown rocks,the deep green pine trees,and the 「典例2] late afternoon sun mixed to create a magic scene.It (2020·新高考I8.Ⅱ卷节选)“I wish we could looked like a beautiful woven(编织的)blanket spread help him to earn money,"said Clara."His family is out upon the ground just for us. suffering so much.” 这段环境描写描绘了深绿色的松树和傍晚的阳光 94 见此图标阻微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 写作专题 交织在一起的景象，同时使用比喻手法“It looked like 策略2：通过对话描写正面获取人物特点 a beautiful woven blanket spread out upon the [典例2 ground'”将地上的光影比作铺在地上的毯子，构造了一 (2020·新高考I&.卷节进)After their mother 个安静祥和的场景，从侧面体现了作者和父亲当时愉 left the room.the children sat thinking about 悦的心情。 Bernard."I wish we could help him to earn money," 技能2厘清人物关系 said Clara."His family suffering so much. 读后续写中有时会涉及含有多个人物、关系较为 “So do I,"said Harry.“We really should do 复杂的语篇。这时，厘清人物关系就很关键，可以帮助 something to assist them. 学生更加合理地预设文中人物的后续行为，从而让续 根据孩子们的对话“I wish we could help him to 写情节更加合理。边读原文边画出人物关系图可以帮 earn money”及"His family is suffering so much.”可 助学生快速清晰地了解文中人物间的关系，为续写 以看出Clara希望能够帮助Bernard,.因为他的家庭遭 服务。 受了如此多的不幸。由此可以看出Cara是一个善良， 技能3分析人物特点 热心且有同情心的人 人物特点主要指人物的性格特征，如：乐观，善良、 技能4分析矛盾冲突 坚毅、勇敢，热心、机智、冷静。分析人物特点可以帮助 读后续写记叙文原文本中大多会有一个矛盾冲突 我们理解故事情节，推断后续发展，同时，对续写时的 点，续写的内容就是解决矛盾冲突点的过程。因此明 人物描写有很好的指导作用。 确矛盾冲突点是非常重要的。矛盾冲突点主要体现在 策略1：通过外貌、动作、心理等细节描写获取 人物所想达到的目的与目前阻碍其达到其目的的因素 人物特点 上。续写的大方向就是通过提供清除障碍、达成目标 [典例1] 的方法以解决相应的矛盾冲突。由于在历险类题材的 (2022·浙江卷节选)Needless to say,I didn't 读后续写中，原文中的矛盾冲突点通常较为明显，因 look forward to an entire term of being brushed off. 此，在这里我们以矛盾冲突点不明显的非历险类题材 but I tried to make the best of it and didn't say 的读后续写为例，讲解如何分析矛盾冲突。 anything for fear that I would make things worse. [典例门 (2022·新高考1C.Ⅱ卷节选)…His usual big When my teammate and I met to discuss our toothy smile was absent today.I walked over and project,I was uneasy.Here was this challenging asked him why he wasn't with the other children.He student who had a reputation for single-mindedness hesitated and then said he had decided not to run. and good grades-the exact opposite of me.I actually What was wrong?He had worked so hard for wanted to drop the class at one point.but stopped this event! short because I didn't want to give him the I quickly searched the crowd for the school's satisfaction of my chickening out.I decided to stick to coach and asked him what had happened."I was it no matter what. afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at 选文中I didn't look forward to表明作者不想和him,”he explained uncomfortably,“I gave him the 老师分配的新队友合作。同时后文提到I tried to choice to run or not,and let him decide.” make the best of可以看出他仍然努力做到最好，担心 根据文章选段中的“What was wrong?He had 因为自己把事情弄得更糟，这说明他是一个顾全大局： worked so hard for this event!”可知，David为这次越 有贵任心的人。后文“I actually wanted to drop the 野跑付出了很大的努力。同时根据“His usual big class at one point”提到作者一度考虑过退课。同时“I toothy smile was absent today..”和“He hesitated and didn't want to give him the satisfaction of my then said he had decided not to run..”可知，David似乎 chickening out.I decided to stick to it no matter 没有平常开心：他决定不参加比赛。又根据“Iwas what,”这句的心理描写表明作者最终还是坚持了下 afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at 米，这也说明了作者是一个坚毅，不服输的人 him”可知，David之所以没有参赛是因为教练告诉他 95 心高考一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标跟微信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 可能会遭到其他学校学生的陶笑。因此.阻碍David After long discussions we somehow agreed to do 参赛的因素是畏惧旁人的嘲笑。所以续写部分应该围 a study on the psychological well-being of teenagers. 绕David追寻自己的内心，不理会别人的看法，克服困 I wasn't sure what it meant exactly,but at least we 难最终战胜自己并重回赛场展开。 had a topic. 在确定了原文本的感情基调、厘清了人物关系、掌 注意：1.续写词数应为150左右： 握了人物特点，明确了矛盾冲突之后，续写时应本着解 2.请按如下格式作答。 决矛盾冲突的目的，依据原文的感情基调、人物关系、 We started to meet regularly to draw up our 人物特点等因素，朝着积极的结局去续写文章。 plans. [真题例证 (2022·浙江卷改编)When Dr.Henderson was assigning (project mates for his psychology class,I secretly hoped he would pair me with my best friend or at least a classmate I could have some fun with.Above all,I hoped he wouldn't assign me to work with the fiercely competitive and extremely One day I got word that he was admitted to serious fellow who always wore dark clothes and hospital for a serious disease. apparently had a personality to match.As fate() would have it.Dr.Henderson very deliberately matched everyone in class and announced that I would be working with the one person in class I wanted to avoid. I went up to my new teammate and introduced myself.He looked at me as though I weren't there.I felt [真题分析] he treated me as though I would hold him back and 1,通过文中描写主人公的形容词或动词把握感情基调 probably make him fail to get an "A"in the course.He 原文第一段第二句“I hoped he wouldn't assign me wasn't mean or abusive:he just gave me the impression to work with the fiercely competitive and extremely serious he could do whatever project we dreamed up better if he fellow who always wore dark elothes and apparently had a did it alone. personality to match.”通过用形容词competitive和 Needless to say,I didn't look forward to an serious来描述作者不想合作的同学的性格特点：表明 entire term of being brushed off,but I tried to make 了作者不想与之共事的原因。 the best of it and didn't say anything for fear that I 通过原文第一段末的I wanted to avoid可以看出 would make things worse. 作者并不想分到这位新队友，由此可推知作者的心理 The projeet required each team to develop a是i抗拒的。同时原文第五段中stick to it表明作者虽 hypothesis(假i说)，set up an experiment to test the 然不想和他成为队友但是仍然坚持下去，由此可推知 hypothesis.do the statistical analysis and present the 作者是坚毅，不服输的。由此可以看出，原文道染的感 findings.Whatever grade the team received would be 情基调是积极向上和正能量的， shared by both students. 2.通过思维导图厘清人物关系 When my teammate and I met to discuss our Dr.Henderson project.I was uneasy.Here was this challenging Teachers and Teaehers and students student who had a reputation for single-mindedness students and good grades-the exact opposite of me.I was outmatched.I actually wanted to drop the class at Me Teammates The boy one point,but stopped short because I didn't want to 由人物关系图可知：Dr.Henderson和作者以及这 give him the satisfaction of my chickening out.I个男生是师生关系，这个男生是作者的新队友，Dr decided to stick to it no matter what. Henderson是这个项目的组织者，老师将作者和他在 96 见此图标酮微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 写作专题 班上想回避的那个人分配在了一起。厘清了这些人物it no matter what.”可知，作者虽然面临重重困难但是 关系后，在续写时就能正确把握人物之间的情感，让情 仍然努力坚持做到最好。因此，作者几次退缩的原因 节朝着既合乎情理，又合乎逻辑的方向发展。 是作者对于新队友不完整的认知。所以续写部分应该 3.通过心理和动作描写获取人物特点 围绕作者在面临困难的情况下改变对队友的看法，最 原文第五段第一，二句“When my teammate and I 终顺利完成课题展开。 met to discuss our project,I was uneasy.Here was [范文赏读] this challenging student who had a reputation for We started to meet regularly to draw up our single-mindedness and good grades--the exact plans.At first,I didn't offer many ideas.However. opposite of me..”提到，当作者和他的队友讨论课题的as our project progressed,I gradually got involved because 时候，作者感到很不安。因为作者的成绩并不好，并且I found him quite patient and tolerant,never failing to 难以专心。同时该段中的“I didn't want to give him respond to my confusions,in a very serious manner.He the satisfaction of my chickening out.I decided to even readily accepted my proposal that we conduct a stick to it no matter what.”提到，作者并不想认输，所questionnaire survey among us students,which gave me a 以作者决定无论如何都要坚持下来。这说明作者勇于 great sense of satisfaction.As the project went on 面对困难，是个有责任心的人 smoothly,our relationship deepened and I found that he 4,分析矛盾冲突 was just introvert.cool on the outside. 根据原文第一段第一句中的“.I seeretly hoped One day I got word that he was admitted to he would pair me with my best friend or at least a hospital for a serious disease.It struck me almost classmate I could have some fun with.”可知，当老师like a bolt from the blue..When I visited him in the 在分配队友的时候，作者希望老师能将他和最好的朋hospital,I found him,my teammate,lying on the bed,. 友分成一组。再根据本段最后一句“As fate would looking pale,That sight really stung my heart,so I felt have it,Dr.Henderson very deliberately matched like doing something for him,more exactly,for our team. everyone in class and announced that I would be Afterwards,I spent a whole week preparing for the working with the one person in class I wanted to presentation,going through all the figures and doing avoid,”及后面两段描写的新队友对作者的态度以及rehearsals for the presentation over and over again.Asit 作者的心理活动可知，老师给作者安排了他想避开的turned out,Dx.Henderson gave an“A”for our project..i 人，并且当作者主动向新队友介绍自己时，自己还被他was the best gift for his recovery and also a token of our 无视了，根据原文第三段第一句中的I tried to make everlasting friendship. the best of it及第五段最后一句“I deeided to stick to 技法二精心构建情节 在构建情节上，我们可以通过解读首句，连环发问 Read the second given sentence,what questions will 的方式。考生应该分析所给的段首句，捕捉其中的核 you ask yourself? 心词，然后自我设置有关行为、情感，结果等能引领故 DHow should paragraph I be ended reasonably? 事发展的间题，从而推动情节发展。常见的设问方 (第一段应该如何合理地结束？) 式有： ②What would the writer/the characters do?(作 Read the first given sentence,what questions will you 者人物会怎么做？) ③How did the writer/the characters feel?(作者/ ask yourself? 人物会有什么样的感受？) ①What did the writer/,the characters do?(f作者/ How should paragraph 2 be ended reasonably? 人物做了什么？) (第二段应该如何合理地结束？) ②How did the writer the characters feel?(作者/ ⑤What's the writer's opinion of the thing?(作者 人物会有什么样的感受？) 对这件事有何看法？) ③What was the result'?(这件事的结果如何？) ①How will the story develop?(后续故事会如何发 当学生在平时训练中熟悉这些通用的问题链，并 展？) 能够结合具体语篇情节选取适用的设问方式，那么在 考场中便能运用这些问题链构架出具体的故事情节。 97 心高多一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标眼微信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 [真题例证] (2023·新高考I卷)阅读下面材料，根据其内容 和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的 短文。 When I was in middle school,my social studies teacher asked me to enter a writing contest.I said no without thinking.I did not love writing.My family I went to my teacher's office after the award came from Brazil,so English was only my second presentation. language.Writing was so difficult and painful for me that my teacher had allowed me to present my paper on the sinking of the Titanic by acting out a play, where I played all the parts.No one laughed harder than he did. So.why did he suddenly foree me to do something at which I was sure to fail?His reply. [真题分析] "Because I love your stories.If you're willing to 仔细阅读原文和首句，连环发问，合理构思情节 apply yourself.I think you have a good shot at this. Paragraph 1:A few weeks later,when I almost Encouraged by his words,I agreed to give it a try. forgot the contest.there came the news. I chose Paul Revere's horse as my subject.Paul 由续写的第一段首句可知，几周后，在“我”几乎淡 Revere was a silversmith (in Boston who rode a 忘了写作比赛时，消息传来了。那具体是什么消息呢？ horse at night on April 18.1775 to L.exington to warn 对于具体故事情节，我们可以作以下联想： people that British soldiers were coming.My story 连环发问 情节示例 would come straight from the horse's mouth.Not a brilliant idea,but funny;and unlikely to be anyone 1.具体是什么样的消 “我”获奖了。 else's choice. 息呢？ What did the horse think,as he sped through the 奇怪的是，“我”并没有表 night?Did he get tired?Have doubts?Did he want to 2.“我”得知消息后的第 现得很惊喜，反而非常 quit?I sympathized immediately.I got tired.I had 一反应是什么？ 平静。 doubts.I wanted to quit.But,like Revere's horse,I 付出如此多的努力之后， kept going.I worked hard.I checked my spelling.I 3.“我”为什么会有这样 “我”认为获奖是水到渠 asked my older sister to correct my grammar.I 的反应呢？ 成的事情。 checked out a half-dozen books on Paul Revere from the library.I even read a few of them. “我”对老师表达了感谢， When I handed in the essay to my teacher,he 多亏了老师的帮助，让 read it,laughed out loud,and said,"Great.Now, 4.颁奖典礼上，“我”是怎 “我”能够直面内心的恐 write it again.I wrote it again,and again and again. 么做的呢？ 惧，并从一个独特的角度 When I finally finished it,the thought of winning had 发掘出了“我”写作上的 given way to the enjoyment of writing.If I didn't 潜力。 win,I wouldn't care. Paragraph 2:I went to my teacher's office after 注意：1.续写词数应为150左右： the award presentation. 2.请按如下格式作答。 由续写的第二段首句可知，颁奖之后“我”去了老 A few weeks later.when I almost forgot the 师办公室。在办公室里，“我”和老师会发生一些什么 contest.there came the news. 故事呢？对于具体的内容，我们可以作以下联想： 98 见此图标跟微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 写作专题 连环发问 情节示例 deserved the result after so much efforts had been made.And at the award presentation,I said, L.老师对“我”获奖的反 他没有吃惊，因为他相信 "Thanks to my teacher's encouragement,I was able 应是什么？ “我”能成功 to directly confront with fears deep in my heart and 从“我”写的关于“秦坦尼 discover my potential in writing from such a unique 克号”的论文中，他发现 perspective." 2.“我”追问老师为何有 “我”对故事情节的理解 I went to my teacher's office a fter the award 如此反应？ 与众不同，因此想要鼓励 presentation."I know you can make it,"my teacher “我”展示自己。 said to me with no surprise.Having no idea why he 世界因不同而精彩，每个 thought that way,I asked the reason."From the 3.这次经历给“我”的启 人都应该被鼓励去自信 paper you wrote about Titanic,I felt your special 发是什么？ 地展现自己。 understanding about plot in story-writing,which is quite different from others."His words made me realize [范文赏读] that the world is beautiful because of its endless A few weeks later,when I almost forgot the possibilities and differences.and everyone should be contest.there came the news.I had won the first encouraged to present themselves confidently. prize,but it's strange that I had no special feeling but to feel very calm.Maybe it's because I thought I 技法三精细打磨语言 构思好续写情节以后，下一步就是进行续写。在②After a day's work,we all tired. 阅卷时，阅卷老师首要关注的是续写的语言，因此续写 -.After a day's work,we all worn out. 语言水平的高低直接决定着续写的成功与否，首先要 升级路径4运用有表现力的副词 规避常见错误，确保拿到及格分，再次要尽力提升写作 恰当地使用富有表现力的副词，能够使文章更加 的语言，努力达到最高档。 丰富多姿，描写地更为准确，文章更有生机。使用这些 方法一5大升级路径，词汇亮人一眼 副词时，要注意把握这些词汇的确切内涵，并且符合故 升级路径1笼统词→具体词 事发展的内在逻辑。 Because of her hatred,she looked at him. DThe day was bitterly cold;the moon was shining -Because of her hatred,she glared at him. brightly in the sky. They walked onwards with exhausted bodies through the 2Having no choice.I slowly raised the book.hoping desert. to hide myself. -.They trudged onwards with exhausted bodies 3I was quietly,joyfully and patiently watching as the through the desert. sun painted a brand-new day. 升级路径2简单词→高级词 1On our way back home,my father held me tightly, DThe advice the old man gave Tom was very important. wearing a big frown. -.The advice the old man gave Tom was very significant/vital/critical. 升级路径5运用有表现力的介词短语 2I should be free any time after school next week. 介词with或in后加表示情绪、个性等的名词，经 --I should be available any time after school next 常可以与相应的副词互换，恰当地使用此结构可以增 week. 加表达的多样性。 升级路径3单词·短语 DShe gazed up at him,glowing happily. DHearing the bad news,the boy cried sadly. -She gazed up at him,glowing with happiness. -Hearing the bad news,the boy burst into tears Like a lamp,the moon shone from above.The sadly. stars twinkled their eyes curiously. 99 心高考一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标跟微信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 →Like a lamp,the moon shone from above.The(2)with复合结构：with+宾语+宾语补足语 stars twinkled their eyes with curiosity. DHe stood there and tears of gratitude were [对点训练1] welling up in his eyes. 运用上述方法升级下列黑体字 -.He stood there.(with)tears of gratitude welling up 1.The letter from his parents made him homesick. in his eyes. -.The letter from his parents Her father was lying on his back,and his dog 2.We should try to improve ourselves through was trapped under the truck. learning and prepare for the future. -Her father was lying on his back,his dog We should trapped under the truck. to improve ourselves through learning and for the future. She stood on the platform and waved her hand 3.It was luck that the door was firm enough to stop to her friend. -She stood on the platform with her hand the frightening wolf. waving to her friend. the door was firm enough to stop the frightening wolf. 抢分句式3形容词（短语）作状语 4.In my opinion,I want to talk frankly and sincerely 情感类的形容词在句中作状语，说明主语的情感 with my child about it. 状态。 I want to talk with my child D She was eager and excited,and she waved her about it.frankly and sincerely. hands.trying to attract others'attention. 5.The boy led the way,so I had no difficulty in finding -Eager and excited,she waved her hands,trying the old man's house. to attract others'attention. To Annie's delight,surrounded by his classmates. I had no difficulty Mark seemed like a rock star,and he was cheerful in finding the old man's house. and proud. 方法二7大抢分句式，档次瞬时提升 To Annie's delight,surrounded by his classmates, 抢分句式1分词短语作状语 Mark seemed like a rock star,cheerful and proud. 分词（短语）作状语，通常表示主语所处的状态、事 抢分句式4倒装句 件发生的原因、结果、条件、伴随的情况等，可以更加细 DThe crowd went away one by one. 致地刻画场景。 Away went the crowd one by one. DHe was trembling in a blanket and he said,"I'mAlthough we were cold and tired,the kids'smiling cold." faces cheered us up. →frembling in a blanket,he said,“T'm cold." -Cold and tired though as we were,the kids' 2For a few moments I just stood there.I held that smiling faces cheered us up. ten-dollar bill and I wondered what to buy and whoWith crowds of the audience around,she was so to buy it for. embarrassed that she stood there awkwardly, -For a few moments I just stood there,holding feeling the blood rush to her face. that ten-dollar bill and wondering what to buy and -.With crowds of the audience around,so embarrassed who to buy it for. was she that she stood there awkwardly,feeling the Because he was scolded by his mother.the boy felt blood rush to her face. unhappy. 抢分句式5强调句型 --Scolded by his mother,the boy felt unhappy. The whole situation made her very depressed and 抢分句式2独立主格结构 upset. (1)主语十谓语…，逻辑主语+doing/done…:逻辑 -.It was the whole situation that made her very 主语+doing/.done,主语+谓语… depressed and upset. 100 见此图标酮微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 写作专题 抢分句式6非限制性定语从句 路标的照片并把它发布到网上。（分词短语作状语） We'll also spend some fun time together,singing, dancing and playing games.We hope it will make she took a photo of the nearby road sign and posted them happy. it online. .We'll also spend some fun time together,singing, 2.他又激动又感动，顶着声音出去求助。（形容词短语 dancing and playing games,which we hope will make 作状语) them happy. he followed the sound and went out 抢分句式7虚拟语气 for help. DBut for your help,the boy would have failed in the 3.男孩冲到那位老人的家，满脸是汗。（独立主格） test. The boy rushed to the old man's house, 要不是你的帮助，这个男孩就会在测试中不及格 She told me that without my card,she wouldn't have 4.正是通过投人和汗水，我才能彻底改变自己。（强调句） seen herself,not even the hope during the hard days. I can 她告诉我，如果没有我的卡片，她在艰难的日子里就 change myself inside and out. 会迷失自我，更看不到希望。 5.当他在废墟中营救幸存者时，他几乎不在乎自己的 If I hadn't quarreled with Tom.I wouldn't be trapped in 安全。（倒装句） this awful place.confronted with the danger of death. While he was rescuing survivors in the ruins, 如果我没有和汤姆吵架，我就不会被困在这个可怕 的地方，面对死亡的危险。 6.要不是这次经历，她就不会意识到她应该花更多的 [对点训练2] 时间和家人在一起。（虚拟语气） 根据提示完成下列句子 But for this experience,she 1,知道在短时间内没有人会来帮忙，她拍了一张附近 技法四 丰富细节描写 方法1把静态写成动态 评析：静态描写用形容词nervous来表达她等待 在对人物和事物进行描写时，如果只有静态的描 时的心情，改成动态描写paced up and down outside 写，往往会显得呆板。这时，我们就可以通过将这些静 the room以后，通过人物的身体动作一在房间外腹 态描写转换成动态描写，赋予这些客观事物以运动感 来踱去，将其在等待时万分焦急的心情描绘得准妙 活力感、变化感，使其“活”起来。在读后续写中恰当地 惟肖。 使用动态描写可以更加鲜活地表现人物和事物，使文 [典例3] 章更加引人入胜。 When the host announced that she won the prize,she [典例1] was excited,(静态) I was very terrified at the sight of the fierce wolf.( -.When the host announced that she won the prize, .At the sight of the fierce wolf,I froze with terror. her eyes twinkled with excitement..(动态) (动态) 评析：静态描写用形容词excited来表达她听到主 评析：静态描写用形容词terrified米表达自己看 持人宣布她获奖时的心情.改成动态描写her eyes 到狼时的状态，改成动态描写froze with terror以后， 既写出了自己看到狼时的害怕心理，又突出了身体的 twinkled with excitement以后，通过人物眼神的瞬间 瞬时反应和害怕的程度一吓得呆住了，使得描写更 变化一她的眼睛里闪烁着兴奋的光芒，形象地写出 加形象。 了人物获奖后兴奋，激动的心情。 [典例2] [典例4] She was nervous while waiting.(静态) Upon hearing the bad news,she felt very sad. -.While waiting,she nervously paced up and down -Upon hearing the bad news,her heart ached,tears outside the room.(动态) streaming down her cheeks.(动态) 101 心高考一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标跟發信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 评析：静态描写用形容词sd来表达她听到坏消句意更加明了，且画面感更强，让读者仿佛看到了一个 息时的心情，改成动态描写后，用her heart ached(心满腹孤疑的人物形象。 痛)和tears streaming down her cheeks(眼泪顺着脸[典例3] 颊流下来)这两个动作生动、形象地刻画了人物难过的 The woman quickened her pace towards the red building. 情绪。 Eager to see her beloved daughter,the woman quickened [对点训练1] her pace towards the red building.(添加伴随状语) 请通过把静态写成动态，使下列句子更生动 评析：原句对“那位妇女为什么加快脚步”并没有 1.Jenny was nervous when she walked to the platform. 作任何解释。添加状语后的句子交代了原因，不但丰 富了句子的内容，而且使一个急于见到自己心爱的孩 子的母亲形象跃然纸上。 2.She felt shy when she realized she was being watched. [典例4幻 After finishing his work,the man tiptoed to the bed. .After finishing his work.the man tiptoed to the 3.The old man was happy when his grandson smiled bed so as not to wake his baby.(添加目的状语) at him. 评析：原句只是交代了时间和动作，添加了目的状 语后，不仅解释了主人公这样做的原因，也能从侧面体 现出他对自已孩子的关爱，使句子内容更加丰富。 4.Seeing the meat in the master's hand.the little dog [对点训练2] was extremely excited. 请通过添加状语使下列句子更生动。 1.The boy later went up to his teacher and said sorry. 5.He was disappointed when he heard the news that he failed to win a prize. 2.Suddenly,the woman stood up and entered the house. 方法2添加状语 在写作过程中，我们经常通过添加状语来交代时 3.The boy turned to the strange man. 间、原因、目的、方式、条件、伴随状态、心理状态等，通 过这种方式可以使句意更加清楚明了，同时也可以使 语言更加丰富多样。 4.He stood leaning against the wall. [典例1] Old Peter sat in his empty restaurant. Feeling frustrated,old Peter sat in his empty restaurant. 5.Jack shook my hands tightly. (漆加伴随状语) 评析：原句只是对事实进行了简单的陈述，而添加 了表达心理和情感的状语Feeling frustrated后，读者 方法3细化动作描写 不但能了解事实，还能感受到主人公的祖丧和失意。 在读后续写的写作中，动作描写占有相当大的比 [典例2] 重。学生在续写过程中存在的典型问题就是动作描写 The man looked Lily up and down. 不够生动，描写人物动作时粗略带过，对于一些微小的 →The man looked Lily up and down in disbelief..(添动作描写往往兼顾不到。解决这一问题的有效方法之 加方式状语) 一就是在写作过程中要细化动作，把原来的动作分解 评析：原句虽然比较形象地描述了主语的动作，但成一连串细微的动作，形成动作链，这样才能使描述的 是并没有交代他为什么会有这一举动。添加状语后，人物更立体，场景更有画面感，动作更流畅 102 见此图标阻微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 写作专题 [典例1]Lisa朝她父亲走去。 方法4巧用修辞手法 Lisa walked toward her father. 修辞手法在文学作品中是必不可少的手段。在绩 →Lisa saw her father in the distance,so she jumped写时运用您辞手法不但可以发散学生的思维，还可以 up and made her way through the crowd toward him. 使描写更生动，同时也可以增加文章亮点，提升文章的 评析：在细化动作描写中，作者对Ls走向她父 层次。在写作中最常用的就是比喻、拟人，夸张等 亲的动作进行了分解，加进了“saw”“jumped up”这两 手法。 个动作，并且也把原句中画面感不强的walked toward [典例1] 升级为“made her way through the crowd toward'”,不 The lovely children are smiling. 仅使表达更生动形象，还写出了Lsa看到父亲后的激 -.The lovely children's smiling faces are like beautiful 动心情和急于穿过人群和父亲见面的情景。 们owers in spring.(比喻) [典例2]我刷完楼上卧室的墙后就去擦窗户。 评析：原句只是平淡地叙述孩子在笑的场景，运用 After I finished painting walls in the bedroom 比喻的修辞手法后，将孩子的笑脸化作春日里美丽的 upstairs.I went to clean the windows. 花朵，让人仿佛看到了一张张笑脸，描写更加生动、 After I finished painting walls in the bedroom 形象。 upstairs,I brought up some water and old towels.and [典例2幻 then stepped on a bench to clean the windows. Immediately,the forest became very dark. 评析：在细化动作描写中，作者对擦玻璃的准备工 →Immediately,absolute darkness ruled the forest.(拟人) 评析：原句只是平实地描述森林变暗这一场景，运 作和擦玻璃的过程中涉及的动作进行了细致描写。主 人公的一系列动作“brought up”“stepped on”“clean” 用拟人的修辞手法后，赋予原本没有生命力的“黑暗” 使得擦玻璃的场面更具动态感。 以“统治”这个动作，使得黑暗笼罩森林的景象动态化 [典例3]Jason上了一辆出租车。 地呈现在读者眼前，让句子变得更加生动，感染力 更强。 Jason got on a taxi. [典例3] -Jason stopped a taxi,jumped in with his suitcase There's enough food in the cupboard. and told the driver,"Go to the police station please." .There's enough food in the cupboard to feed an 评析：在细化动作描写中，作者将乘出租车的动作 entire army!(夸张) 拆解为“拦车十上车十告诉目的地”通过一连串的细微 评析：原句只是简单描述了橱柜里的食物多，运用 动作“stopped”“jumped in”“told”生动地刻画了 奇张的修辞手法后，对橱柜里食物的量进行谊染，将食 Jason乘出租车时的急切心情。 物之多表达得淋漓尽致。 [对点训练3] [对点训练4幻 请通过细化动作，写出动作过程使下列句子更生动。 根据提示，利用修辞手法使下列句子更生动」 1.Jenny caught the butterfly. 1.My heart was broken.(夸张) 2.The young mother gathered her son into her arms. 2.Jenny walked into the door happily.(比喻) 3.The boys jumped into the water. 3.The bus went slowly,(比喻) 4.The singer began to sing. 4.The classroom was very quiet.(夸张) 5.Tony rushed out of the living room. 5.In the night.we watched the stars in the sky.( 103见此图标酮微信/拼音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 参考答案 before.We are supposed to embrace new technology Five yards,ten yards and more.I was about to and learn new knowledge.For another,learning is a overtake Blake when a second thought came to me. good way to remain vigorous.There are various ways There was Blake.sitting on the ground,sweat rolling to achieve lifelong learning.Post-school training, down his face because of tiredness and pain.With a online courses and interest groups are all available in hint of desperation in his eyes,he squeezed a sad our time. smile.I stopped.Putting one of his arms around my 第三部分 shoulder,I supported him slowly to the finish line. 第一讲提能训练 A reporter took a picture of this moving scene and posted it online.It instantly received thousands [参考范文] of shares and likes.People expressed their respect Before he realized it.Hector found himself and admiration for my courage and selflessness to give standing in Mr.Adler's room."Hector!Come and up what could be an easy victory.One viewer even help me look for.”“This?”Hector stopped Mr.commented,“Nowadays people tend to focus too Adler mid-sentence,holding out the open envelope.much on 'win or loss'.It's a great comfort to see Mr.Adler's brows were smoothed but then knitted that true sportsmanship still exists."We were again.Before he formed questions.Hector started:impressed with the idea that friendship comes first at unbosoming his regrets.If he had waited another an early age.I was quite proud to have lived up to moment,they would have torn him into pieces."Can that idea and to have served as a reminder. I still be in the Bee?”asked Hector timidly.第二讲 "Absolutely,my honest boy,"Mr.Adler patted his 技法三 shoulder."I don't believe in punishing people for 对点训练1 making the right decisions and correcting their 1.aroused his homesick mistakes."Immense relief washed over Hector. 2.take pains/struggle;get prepared 3.Luckily The next day the entire school came to watch the 4.Personally 5.With the boy leading the way Fifth Grade Geography Bee.Having been up late对点训练2 studying.Hector looked exhausted but extremely 1.Knowing no help could come in a short time excited.So did all the other competitors.All the eyes 2.Excited and moved fixed on the stage,Hector felt blood rushing onto his 3.his face covered with sweat cheeks and his heart beating fast.Unfortunately,the 4.It's through commitment and sweat that questions Mr.Adler rewrote were so tough that he:5.little did he care about his own safety was knocked out in round three.But Hector realized:6.wouldn't have realized that she should spend more in surprise that he didn't feel bad about losing at all. time with her family Whether others knew he was smart was of no 技法四 significance.He'd set out to learn everything about 对点训练1 the world and ended up learning more about himself. 1.Jenny walked slowly to the platform,with her legs B trembling and her heart bumping nearly out of her [参考范文] chest. Suddenly Blake slowed and sat onto the ground 2.Color rushed/flooded/rose to her cheeks when she painfully.My chance came!Excitement took over.I realized she was being watched. refocused my attention on the course and speeded my 3.The old man wore a shining smile on his face when pace.My legs didn't feel like stone anymore; his grandson smiled at him. instead,the long lost springiness came back to me.4.Seeing the meat in the master's hand,the little dog 109 心高考一轮总复习·英语·WY见此图标眼微信/抖音扫码添加智能学习伙伴，突破一轮复习难点。 wagged its tail excitedly and watched with hopeful smiled and encouraged him."An apology never comes eyes. late."Jeremy raised his eyebrows and said in a low 5.His heart sank when he heard the news that he voice,"I shouldn't have said that.Sorry."Tamika failed to win a prize. looked down at her skates,wiped her tears and 对点训练2 murmured "Actually.that's OK.It's my skate". 1.Deeply aware of his mistakes,the boy later went spinning the loose wheel. up to his teacher and said sorry. “I can fix it,”Jeremy said with confidence. 2.Suddenly,the woman stood up and entered the Grabbing her skate,Jeremy tightened the screws in house in tears. no time.He looked up brightly and handed the skate 3.The boy turned to the strange man,with his eyes to Tamika.Tamika tried her skate and surprisingly it full of horror. was working well.A slight smile lifted,"Thanks. 4.He stood leaning against the wall,unable to speak.Jeremy felt a wave of relief flooding into his heart."I 5.Jack shook my hands tightly as if we were long lost help my dad fix things all the time.You know.I friends. didn't go anywhere either this summer,"he said. 对点训练3 Then they three looked at each other and burst into 1.Jenny crept along the path,bent over swiftly and laughter.Truly,they did not have to travel far to cupped her hands around the butterfly gently. learn anything new. 2.The young mother dashed forward,knelt down and B gathered her son into her arms. [参考范文] 3.The boys rushed excitedly to the lake,took off From that day on,I took good care of the their clothes and jumped into the water. puppy.who I named Deedo.In order to make him 4.The singer glanced at the audience,took a deep recover as soon as possible,I treated his wound and breath and began to sing. saved all my pocket money to buy food for him. 5.Hearing his friend calling him,Tony jumped up Under my careful care,Deedo's wound healed and rushed out of the living room quickly.My whole family loved Deedo except my 对点训练4 father,who insisted on sending Deedo away.I 1.My heart was broken into a million pieces. begged and pleaded with him until he finally agreed to 2.Jenny couldn't resist her inner joy.flying into the:take Deedo in.Day by day,Deedo grew healthy and door like a bird. strong,becoming my best friend.From then on,my 3.The bus went as slowly as a snail. lonely mood became cheerful. 4.The classroom was so quiet that a needle could be One day.I found my father's attitude towards heard when dropped. Deedo changed.On arriving home,the first thing he 5.In the night,we watched the stars blinking their would do was greet him.In return,Deedo became eyes naughtily in the sky. friendly to my father.He even waited at the gate 提能训练 every day,expecting my father's arrival.Our home gradually came to life with the arrival of Deedo.What [参考范文] astonished our family most was that my father came At this moment,Jeremy was walking by and home one day with a stray dog too.Now Deedo and saw them.Noticing Tamika's teary eyes,Jeremy the dog my father picked up became friends and they swallowed what he'd intended to say.A sense of guilt were inseparable together. seized him and he stood there,frozen.Miss Snowden 110