如何润色语言，升级有技巧读后续写作文指导课件 -2024届高考英语一轮复习

如何润色语言——升级有技巧 构思好续写情节之后,在具体的续写时,我们应对所罗列的要点进行筛选、整合、打磨,让文章语言更出彩。 首先,考虑与原文用词特点和行文风格的一致。观察有无直接引语、各类从句、特殊句型、非谓语动词的灵活运用等。通过模仿创新,提高与原文的协调性,使用多样的句式和结构以及有效的衔接词,力求在各个语言层次的表达风格上与原文保持一致。 同时,确保语言运用的正确、生动、形象。根据情节需要可以运用一些优化语言的技巧提升语言表达效果。 　　在写作过程中,我们经常通过添加状语来交代时间、原因、目的、方式、条件、伴随状态、心理状态等,使句意更加清楚明了,同时也可以使语言更加丰满。 【典例1】　 原句 Old Peter sat in his empty restaurant. 添加状语后 Feeling frustrated, old Peter sat in his empty restaurant. 简评 原句只是对事实进行了简单地陈述,而添加了表达心理和情感的状语Feeling frustrated后,读者不但能了解事实,还能感受到主人公的沮丧和失意 添加状语,表达更生动 原句 The woman quickened her pace towards the red building. 添加状语后 Eager to see her beloved daughter, the woman quickened her pace towards the red building. 简评 原句对“那位妇女为什么加快脚步”没有作任何解释,添加状语后的句子交代了原因,不但丰富了句子的内容,而且使一个急于见到自己心爱的孩子的母亲的形象跃然纸上 【典例2】　 通过添加状语使下列句子更为生动 1.The man looked Lily up and down. → 　The man looked Lily up and down in disbelief.　⁠ 2.The dog leapt to his feet, snorted happily and bounded forward. → 　Upon his master’s arrival, the dog leapt to his feet, snorted happily and bounded forward.　⁠ 3.After finishing his work, the man tiptoed to the bed. → 　After finishing his work, the man tiptoed to the bed so as not to wake his baby.　⁠ The man looked Lily up and down in disbelief.　 Upon his master’s arrival, the dog leapt to his feet, snorted happily and bounded forward.　 After finishing his work, the man tiptoed to the bed so as not to wake his baby.　 　　在读后续写的写作中,动作描写占有相当大的比重。学生在续写过程中存在的典型问题就是语言表达欠生动,描写人物动作时粗略带过,对于一些微小的动作描写往往兼顾不到。解决这一问题的有效方法之一是在写作过程中要细化动作,把原来的动作分解成一连串细微的动作,形成动作链,这样才能使人物或描述的场景更有画面感和立体感。 细化动作,形成动作链 原句 Lisa walked toward her father. 细化后 Lisa saw her father in the distance, so she jumped up and made her way through the crowd toward him. 简评 在细化动作描写中,作者对Lisa向她父亲走去的动作进行了分解,加进了saw和jumped up这两个动作,并且也把原句中画面感不强的 walked toward 升级为made her way through the crowd toward,不仅使表达更生动形象,还表现出了Lisa看到父亲后的激动心情和急于穿过人群和父亲见面的情景 【典例3】　 原句 After I finished painting walls in the bedroom upstairs, I went to clean the windows. 细化后 After I finished painting walls in the bedro